Brooklyn, I'm Trying

The Weekend Guide | 13-16 February 2020

Liz Norment — Thu, 13 Feb 2020 21:22:04 +0000

City love. It’s visceral. It’s irrepressible. It’s all around us because let’s face it, such is life here. There is no privacy, there is no retreat. And we find that we are all searching for it, that city love. We are all, always, on the prowl. Where is it. Who is he. What’s she like. Could that be for me?

City love. It’s elusive. It overtakes us, it displaces us. It forces us to pause indefinitely because of train traffic ahead of us. It’s public embraces, it’s the single silhouette of two, in the glow of any apartment on any street in any neighborhood. And some day, it will cause you to find yourself crying by yourself, among strangers, on the subway.

City love. It can be yours, they say, if you stop looking for it and instead, start doing what you love. That’s what it said on a card that I have kept on my desk for 8 years and 7 job changes and admittedly, at least 12 fairly serious relationships.

So, stop looking for it. And start doing all of the amazing things that will convince you that the city is yours; that you are in the right place, at the right time.

I can show you how.

Munchies Cookbook Club at Archestratus in Greenpoint

Get the munchies with your friends this Thursday night at Archetratus. It’s their monthly cookbook club meeting, which is basically a themed potluck dinner that centers around a different cookbook each time. This week’s we’ll all be cooking up something special from the Munchies Guide to Dinner, so you know it will be delicious and fun and better than whatever you were thinking about cooking tonight. So cook and then come and make sure you put that trusty little piece of masking tape with your name on it on the bottom of your dish; potluckers have notoriously sticky fingers. (I’m kidding, but my mom definitely didn’t trust anyone at my church growing up) Info here. 7-9pm, 160 Huron St.

Tell Two Trees where to put their Two Towers at this meeting in Williamsburg

Hey. Have you been to Domino Park recently? Have you seen that massive, interactive mural they installed to distract us from the fact that they are throwing up massive skyscrapers with no hesitation as to who the hell will move into the mostly vacant skyscrapers that are already there, nor the very necessary need for additional infrastructure to support these overwhelming structures? Well, the lovely people at Two Trees (you know, the guys that Scabby likes to follow around) will be holding a meeting to introduce us to their tower proposal, which, for the record, we simply don’t need. Let’s tell them that. RSVP here, it’s happening from 6:30-8:30pm at 240 Kent Ave.

Things to do in Brooklyn on Friday

There’s almost no reason you shouldn’t be doing all of the things I’ve already perfectly planned for you this Friday night right here, in my 2020 Valentine’s Day Guide…

Unless of course, you have some weird fetish that you can no longer contain…

Fetish Party at House of Yes in Bushwick

Hey listen, I get it. You’re into some weird shit, sexually. And in case you feel like Valentine’s Day dinner isn’t the place to bring it up, just wear your latex under your dress and bring your spiked collar and convince your date to head to House of Yes afterward… or just go without him. Because you can’t, and don’t have to, contain your true desires any longer. Tickets and info here. Costumes required. 10pm-4am, 2 Wyckoff Ave.

Or you just really hate Valentine’s Day.

It’s Friday, I’m (not) In Love Party at Littlefield, Gowanus

Valentine’s Day is annoying. There’s nothing worse than receiving a dozen red roses and a Russell Stover’s sampler from your “person” on February 14th and wondering if he’s ever listened to a fucking word you’re saying. Valentine’s Day is not real. Heartbreak is real. Ghosting is real (and effective!) Making love in the bathroom is real. Celebrate real love or the lack thereof this Friday night at Littlefield. Wear all black, prizes for creativity. $6-10, party starts at 10:30pm. all info here. 635 Sackett St.

Makossa joins Almost Too Much at Magick City in Greenpoint

What happens to your favorite cookout party group in the wintertime? Do they hibernate? Does the glow of the coals turn a cold, frosty grey? Does anything get shoved between their buns at all? Come and find all of the magickal answers to those questions this Friday night at Magick City. Makossa will be bringing the summer party indoors and partnering with Almost Too Much to throw an amazing dance party, all night. Stop by Le Fanfare first for a custom cocktail made by yours truly (ps I use “custom” quite loosely here). Tickets and info here. 11pm-4am at 37 Box St.

Things to do in Brooklyn on Saturday

Phil Collins Day at Greenpoint Beer and Ale

Things that Greenpoint loves- Phil Collins, locally-brewed beer, and long-awaited openings. Come and celebrate all of these things at the same time this Saturday! It’s Phil Collins Day at the FINALLY open Greenpoint Beer and Ale. They’ll have a live cover band, tons of records and memorabilia, and raffle prizes. Confused about why Greenpoint loves Phil so much? After Brooklyn claimed an official Day after the beloved singer in 2011, Greenpoint parade on this day through the neighborhood, complete with a live, marching cover band. And Greenpoint Ale is just trying to bring that spirit back. Come, help. It’s free and starts at 3pm. Info here. 1150 Manhattan Ave.

Nasty Baby Strip Club Takeover by House of Yes in Midtown West

Because I swear me and the writer over at House of Yes share the same voice, I’ll just let them take it from here: Valentine’s Weekend is upon us, which means expensive dinners, cheesy gifts, and underwhelming sex. Instead, invest your money into something of real value: STRIPPERS. Nasty Baby returns on Saturday February 15 – our infamous strip club takeover where we remodel a manhattan strip club into everything a strict club should be: inclusive, sex-positive, gender-fluid, sex-worker affirming, flesh-filled utopia.

Go. Dance. Celebrate nudity. Tickets and info here. This party is NOT at House of Yes- it’s at 603 W. 45th St, which makes it your only #reasontocrosstheriverthisweekend

The Last Dance Party at Humboldt & Jackson in Williamsburg

It’s so sad when great places close in this town, but I must say, this one is especially bittersweet. Our wonderful friends at H&J will be turning their amazing space over to the Meat Hook to give them their first-ever stand-alone restaurant, which means only good, meaty things to come in the future. But go down with the ship in style this Sunday night with their “Save the Last Dance” Dance Party. It’s free and it’s fun it deserves you to pay it some funky homage before it leaves us. Info here. 434 Humboldt St.

Grand Street Restaurant Week, Williamsburg

Ah, restaurant week in New York- a highly anticipated and seemingly a great way to have a new experience for a great value! …And then you get there and it’s overrun with people who don’t know how to dine out and the food lets you down and everyone is on top of each other and you order too many drinks to deal with your frustration and then you’re paying way way more than anticipated for a mediocre experience… which I guess is also exactly what it’s like to live in Manhattan. Let’s just do this shit our own way. It’s Grand Street Restaurant Week, and just as every time you’ve ever subbed one experience for another across the river, it will be so much grander on our side. 15 amazing restaurants, it starts on TUESDAY but get your reservations in now. all info you need is here, including menus! Along Grand St.

Things to do in Brooklyn on Sunday

Tiki Disco at House of Yes in Bushwick

When your favorite party group and your favorite venue/family in Brooklyn get together, you go. And you dance. And you revel in the pure unadulterated joy that you live in a place where events like this exist. Tiki Disco hits House of Yes for their last indoor party of the season before we can all party under the moonlight with them all summer long. Besides, Monday is “President’s Day.” Let’s show respect for that dick bag we have in office and be hungover as shit and completely worthless and still somehow be more productive than he is. Tickets and info here, $15-20. 10pm-4am, 2 Wyckoff Ave.

Mouse Taxidermy at Quimby’s Bookstore in Williamsburg

God bless you, Brooklyn. This weekend marks the return of one of my favorite events of all time- that’s right folks, it’s mouse taxidermy! Our best chance this weekend to reduce that frightening 3:1 rodent to human ration in this city (no joke, you’re never more than 20 feet from one…) (GAHHHHHHH.) In the back of the always charming and quirky Quimby’s bookstore this Sunday, you’ll be led through a beginner’s taxidermy course led by Daisy Tainton, who worked at the Museum of Natural History for over a decade and promises she’s handled a lot nastier shit than dead mice during her career. So go, shake her hand, and leave with your own little mousey sculpture (props available!) Also, I can’t completely confirm this, but in the past she’s offered an extra mouse head for an additional $50. So bring $50 just in case. All info here. Also bring your cat. Show him you really are on his side. 536 Metropolitan Ave.

Hotbox Mobile Sauna Pop-Up in Bushwick

Was your red-hot weekend of love a little lukewarm this year? Don’t fret it, baby… sweat it. Our favorite little hot box will be opening its doors (but you know, just like for a quick moment each time) this Sunday so you can get hot with some strangers. Hot Box is a traveling sauna and it’s guaranteed to cure those winter blues and the chill in your bones and potentially the loneliness in your heart. Reserve your spot here, and maybe just hold onto your sauna hat unless you see other people wearing them. 2-6pm. 26 Vandervoort Pl.

The Weekend Guide | 23-26 February 2017

Liz Norment — Thu, 23 Feb 2017 21:43:19 +0000

can i tell you something? i don’t want to say it too loud, so lean in.

come on, get closer.

(i think that winter is over.)

YEP. i said it. and that means a few things here:

we have got to stop listening to that groundhog for our seasonal weather reports.
let’s throw all of our scarves and hats and cloves into the back of the closer and strip away layers of clothing along with our inhibitions and throw caution to the wind.
meet me in the park and let’s drink until the sun goes down then dance on a rooftop until it greets us again this and let summer start within us, to hell with what the calendar says.

and so what if we’re wrong? if it gets cold again and then we can’t find our gloves and hats? let’s believe it and live it right now. because that’s why we live here, to squeeze every moment and extract a more significant life out of the fruits of our labors.

and in that case, consider me a juicer, baby. because i’ve squeezed out all the best ways to get after it this weekend and i’m serving it to you in a cool and frothy glass, ripe and ready for the drinkin’ and i call it your weekend guide.

drink up, it’s all here for you.

THURSDAY

Hand Pulled Noodles of Xi’an at MOFAD, Williamsburg.

pronounced “Chee-yan” (yep, you’re welcome.) if you’ve never had the pleasure that is Xian’s famous food, do yourself a favor and go now, and often. the only thing better than every single thing on their menu is the homegrown story of how it all came about. because we could all use a reason to believe in the american dream again… head to the museum of food and drink for a look at their story, pulled straight from the ~~heart~~ ~~hand~~ heart.. tickets and info here, $10 630-8pm.

Two Step Lessons at Threes Brewing in Gowanus

step 1 – head down gowanus. step 2 – get pulled onto the dance floor semi-unwillingly for a two-step lesson. step 3 – drink what threes been brewing three times. 4 – feel loose and git your two step on. 5 – repeat, repeat, threepeat. lesson starts at 845pm, blue steel starts at 930 and won’t stop until you stop steppin’. (so don’t stop steppin.) all info here, 333 douglass st at threes brewing – i’ll try anything thrice.

Rusted Root at Brooklyn Bowl, Williamsburg.

all i need is food and creative love and also rusted root reminding me how good life is just down the street at brooklyn bowl thursday night. they play along side flow tribe. they’ll send you on your way for $20. tickets and all other info here. 61 wythe ave.

FRIDAY

Dolly Parton Lookalike Contest at Mable’s Smokehouse, Williamsburg

everyone’s favorite neighborhood smokehouse is throwing a contest of precisely their caliber. equal parts charm and trash, class and kitsch, my only complaint is that this contest completely discriminates against brunettes. i could absolutely kick ass at this if i was, of course, naturally endowed with light hair. ANYWAY, you don’t want to miss this shit. plus if you didn’t know, they have a bourbon iced tea that will knock your socks off (in the best way) and free peanuts. that you shuck on the floor. to enter, email events@mablessmokehouse.com. free to attend, drink specials all night. additional info here, 44 berry st.

Private Party with Rinsed, somewhere in Bushwick.

ah, rinsed. i blame you for my insatiable hunger for mischief… or, a certain variety of it at least. the secret-dingy-warehouse-where-we-go-hard-all-fucking-night variety. if you haven’t been to one of these parties, you haven’t been listening to a thing i’ve been saying the past year and a half. the best music, the most insane installations, and near impenetrable level of anonymity. go friday night. tickets and the info they want to tell you is here. 10pm-welllll into saturday.

SATURDAY

DJ Bengey at Union Hall, Park Slope.

you know that good dance music and a good venue big enough for all your moves but intimate enough for all your bad decisions is goddamn hard to come by. well, the master of ceremonies of exactly such a place is back and wants to see you. and you. and you too. all gettin’ down with your bad selves. DJ Bengey returns after a long(ish) hiatus to make your saturday nights better than your memories of last weekend are. midnight-4am, all info here, 702 union st.

Galactic Fundraiser for Planned Parenthood by the Wild Honey Pie, in the Bronx.

your reason to cross the river this weekend is for a galactic gala, an outerspace-themed fundraiser with music from jukebox the ghost, rubblebucket and pronoun sponsored by (big surprise) our good friends at the wild honey pie. with your $100 ticket you also get a meal with all the fixin’s, open bar and silent auction, and knowing that your saturday night activities went toward something good- all proceeds go to support planned parenthood who desperately need our support and attention in these desperate times. tickets and info here #revelwithacause 841 baretto st at lightbox-NY.

Good Room turns 4! Anniversary Party in Greenpoint.

can you believe it’s been 4 whole years since the good room was born from the remains of the old club europa? 4 years of us partying our asses off, all night, to some of the best house music this town has to offer? 4 years of finally finding a worthy place to do bad things? well, let’s commemorate it all friday night by celebrating such an epic anniversary and of course pretend that we haven’t aged a bit. taakaki itoh and iori spin tunes all night. $15, tickets and info here. and hey brooklyn, here’s to 4 more years of being bad. 98 meserole ave.

809 Project Fundraiser at Bar Matchless, Greenpoint.

while we are all riled up and resisting and fighting for so many things we took for granted before the toupeed cheeto took office, let’s make sure we’re also using this momentum and passion to help people outside of our country who are in need. saturday night at bar matchless in greenpoint come jam out to 7 bands as part of the 809 project, a cross-genre arts festival that helps raise awareness and funds for issues in the dominican republic. saturday night’s event goes to support the dream project, a non-profit focusing on early childhood education and development. tickets are only $15 and are available here. 7pm, 557 manhattan ave #revelwithacause

Super Powers Dance Party at House of Yes, Bushwick.

the atmosphere at house of yes has us all feeling like we have super powers. aerial acrobatics, extracurricular habits, pink rabbits… and those bathrooms. let’s all dress the part saturday night at their super powers dance party. come dressed as your favorite super hero, comic book character, or just wear something wacky and make up a name, an ability, an adventure. their all-resident dj lineup is guaranteed to have you movin’ all night. free before 11pm! tickets and other info here. 2 wyckoff ave at house of yes means no means yes means no means yes, yes yes.

SUNDAY

Indigo Shibori Workshop, Space98, Williamsburg.

don’t dingy whites make you want to dye. ME. TOO. come learn the ancient practice of shibori dyeing with beezie’s textiles this sunday at ~~urban outfitters~~ space98 and leave with new and revamped textiles and the ability to turn any fabric into a deep indigo dream. oh also- they will have drinks. they’ll supply you with one towel (kind of like the gym. but, nothing else like the gym.) bring your own clothing to breathe fresh life into and use fabrics, tools, and dyes provided. $65 tickets HERE. noon-3pm at space98, 98 N 6th st. wine and dye me, baby.

ah yes, it’s OSCARS sunday! check out my top neighborhood picks below and drink all of the champagne you can handle. because why not. #campaignforchampagne

The Diamond, Greenpoint.

i love this bar. and you should too, if for no other reason than their reference to “dark lord cheeto” on this poster and the fact that there will be “oscar meyers in blankets” at the party. and, of course, the 7-minutes in heaven gondola out back. this is the oscars party you want to go to. starts at 6pm. all other info here. 43 franklin st.

Northern Territory, Greenpoint.

if you haven’t checked out the greatest meryl streep themed instagram account ever, do yourself a favor… then do yourself a flavor of the women herself at northern territory sunday night. their oscars party is in collaboration with the ‘gram and in celebration of the ‘streep, so treat yourself to drink specials and a chance to win some streep goodies pre-show starts at 7pm, admission is free. 12 franklin st.

Humboldt & Jackson, Williamsburg.

so you wanna get fancy? you still don’t have to cross the river. head to humboldt & jackson’s oscars party. get glammed out and walk the red carpet (for real), participate in a best dressed contest, document how good you look dressed up in their photo booth, and win raffle prizes. plus drink specials and oh yeah, the oscars. you can watch them here. rsvp required, do so here now. party starts at 7pm. 434 humboldt st.

you’re all winners in my book.

<3L.

The Weekend Guide | 9-12 February 2017

Liz Norment — Thu, 09 Feb 2017 21:26:31 +0000

we’ve been fighting, brooklyn. fighting to live, fighting to survive, fighting to navigate this concrete jungle we landed our vicious hearts into, fighting stubborn landlord tyrants who have somehow been placed in positions of great power in this city. fighting.

and all of this fighting, of course, is from the intense and immense free-flowing love we have abounding from our hearts, moving our feet, stimulating our minds, helping us come up with really charming slogans for our blogs. and as love fearlessly and relentlessly trumps hate, let’s use this weekend of love to make a difference, to see a difference, to insight a difference and of course to simply make love. revel with a cause, brooklyn. and love with a purpose (not a porpoise) and make love, be love, spread love…

it’s the brooklyn way.

ALL WEEKEND

Grand Street Restaurant Week, WIlliamsburg

ah, restaurant week in new york. highly anticipating and seemingly a great way to have a new experience for a great value! and then you get there and it’s overrun and the food blows and everyone is on top of each other and you order too many drinks to deal with your frustration and then you’re paying way way more than anticipated for a mediocre experience. which i guess is also exactly what it’s like living in manhattan. let’s just do this ish our own way. it’s grand st restaurant week, and just as every time you’ve ever subbed one experience for another across the river, it will be so much grander. 12 amazing restaurants, it’s happenign through the 12th. all info you need is here, including menus! along grand st.

Matthew E White and Flo Morrissey at Baby’s All Right, Brooklyn.

it is so so easy to share the love of your hometown when your hometown has as much amazing musical talent as richmond does. lucy dacus, dj williams projekt, no BS brass band and of course gwar… and the gem that is matthew e white. his mix of soulful gospel funk digs deep down into your soul and settles there, slightly familiar and engaged. see him play along with flo morrissey at baby’s all right thursday night. all info here, 146 broadway. at baby’s all right – make baby’s all right again

Raise Up for Women at Industry City Distillery, Sunset Park.

the only light in the midst of this deep, dark, shit-filled tunnel we are currently in is that there has been so much good to get involved in. to show your support, to have your voice heard. and especially for womens rights. thursday night at Industry City Distillery, BiT’s favorite (not so)little distillery in sunset park, is hosting a benefit supporting six amazing organizations for women. 100% of the monies goes to benefiting organizations doing amazing work for and by women: Make the Road, My Sister’s Place, Hattie Carthan Community Garden, Black Women Artists for Black Lives Matter, ViBe Theater Experience, Trans Women of Color Collective… plus art, music, performance, installation, dancing, and of course, house made vodka. don’t say no, just say yes. all info here, 7-11pm, 33 35th st, at industry city distillery, where science never looked so sexy or went down so smoothly.

FRIDAY

Prom 2017 at The Gutter, in that gray area between Greenpoint and Williamsburg.

ah, prom! that night of really bad fashion choices, really bad vodka that was hidden indiscreetly in water bottles and chugged in the back of someone’s jeep and immediately followed by really bad dance moves and really bad sex. let’s redo it, eh? ok maybe not the outfits or the cheap vodka but definitely the mediocre love-making. we deserve more, and more, and then more. don’t you tell me to get my head out of the gutter, until you get your head into it. 8pm-midnight, $5. all proceeds go to benefit the ACLU, so we’re already doing much better 4 bands play all night, the rizzos, dentist, the mad doctors, and sirs&madams. all info here, BYOcorsage, and then stick it in someone. baby. everything you need to know is here. 200 N 14th st.

It’s Friday, I’m (not) In Love Party at Littlefield, Gowanus.

you know the best way not to get a little love on valentine’s weekend? it’s to bitch about love. instead, open your hearts and your lips baby. and come to this, “it’s friday i’m not in love” anti-valentine’s day party and change that little opinion of yours. have some drinks, get loose. dance up on a stranger. make love in the bathroom. i don’t care how you do it, just quit your bitchin. also there’s a photo booth. wear all black, prizes for creativity. $6-10. all info here. 622 degraw st.

Planned Parenthood Danceathon at the Knockdown Center in Astoria.

WE MUST PROTECT THIS HOUSE! our bodies, that is. they are temples and there are so many rad ways to celebrate and demonstrate. so this weekend. revel with a cause baby, knock ‘em down, dance it out. at the planned parenthood danceathon at the knockdown center. 9pm-2am, all info here. 52-19 flushing ave.

Interactive Love Games Art Exhibition and Benefit, at IMAGE Gallery, Bushwick.

tell me you didn’t get turned on looking at that photo. you did. well then, it looks like someone should bring their loveworthy little body to interactive love games art exhibition. immerse yourself in edgy, racey, and quite lovely artwork performance, and movement. come solo or with someone or with a few someones. spread love, make love. your donation benefits planned parenthood, so love tha tbody and all the other bodies. tickets and other info here. 7-10pm, 1501 broadway.

SATURDAY

LGBTQ+ Makeout Session in front of Trump Tower. (no i am not kidding.)

oh HELLLLL yeah. listen, it doesn’t matter of course who you love and how you love them because love is love is love, but what does matter is that our shitwad of a president doesn’t feel that way. so if you lean in a more traditional sense of love, let’s bend the rules this saturday. why? because we’re having a big LGBTQ+ makeout sesh in front of trump tower. oh yeah. partners not required and allies welcome! meet at 12pm at the central park west hotel. we will all march together to trump tower and makeout. until 3pm. all info here.

Women Self-Care Faire at the New Women Space in Bushwick

we should keep fighting for our rights and our bodies but we also have to balance it out with plenty of loving. this full-day dedicated to women’s self care celebrates and demonstrates the love we should have for our bodies and ourselves and each other. in partnership with babeland and lunette, the full schedule includes workshops focused on self-love and meditation, organic skincare demonstration made in bushwick, sex toy workshop for enhancing your solo experience or your confidence in the bedroom, and a discussion on the unnecessarily taboo subject of reuseable menstrual products. 12-6pm, full schedule here. let’s do this. all events take place at the new women space, which you should check out all of the amazing things they’re doing there. 188 woodman rd.

El Imperio plays at Threes Brewing, Gowanus.

so it was just threes birthday and we all missed it. yeah. but that’s ok because we can go and celebrate and dance and groove saturday night to el imperio, who will be mixing a rather intoxicating blend of afrobeat, latin, soul and rock to layer over the already intoxicating brews overflowing with love from every oraphus at threes. and by oraphus i mean tap. and your pores as you sweat on the dance floor. drink up and absorb. the event is free, 8-11pm, all info here. 333 douglass st. at threes brewing- i’ll try anything thrice.

Anti-Valentine’s Day Party at the Mccarren Park Hotel, Williamsburg.

do i need to go into the futility of hating valentine’s day again? no? ok good. well, there’s this party happening on the rooftop of the mccarren park hotel which is kind of anti-valentine’s day, but sometimes the things we dislike ignite us and invigorate us and unite us even more. because we don’t have time to be a hater. hater? i hardly knew her! all info here. no cover, come dance all night. 10pm-2am. 160 N 12th st.

SUNDAY

Greenpointers Valentine’s Day Market, in Greenpoint!

oh you know what this is. it’s the super rad valentine’s day market that greenpointers throws every year. amazing artisans, food, drinks, tunes, free poetry, massages, a hell of a great view and a big silly guy dressed in a cupid diaper doing some of the best freestyling i’ve ever heard. come with the intention to buy gifts, stay for everything i’ve just mentioned. this is the best way to spend your sunday (along with all the things mentioned below). all info here, get on it. 67 west st.

Mama’s Bazaar Valentine’s Market at House of Yes, Bushwick.

whoa whoa whoa, did you really think you were going to get through my entire love-centric weekend guide without a mention of house of yes? you crazy boo. everyone’s favorite little love shack warehouse in bushwick brings us a valentine’s day bazaar sunday as a dynamic preview to the beautiful celebration of love they will be having tuesday (stay tuned! but, would you want to spend valentine’s day not in a rooftop hot tub making bad decisions? hm didn’t think so.) sunday’s event will have the normal brooklyn-esque bazaar suspects, artisans, handmade jewelry, interesting soaps incasing magic treasures, as well as henna tattoos, sex toys, s&m gear, sensual massages, and so many more things to bewitch your imagination. happy hour is noon-2pm, dj dropkat spinning tunes until 6pm. all info here. 2 wyckoff ave, see you there.

Cheese Making Class and Romeo + Juliet Viewing at Humboldt and Jackson, Williamsburg.

cheese making, wines, a showing of romeo+juliet and your honey by your side for all of it. it doesn’t get much better than this folks. head to humboldt and jackson for a lesson in ricotta making followed by a cozy showing of romeo+juliet where you can snuggle up to your sweetie and give absolutely no clues that you’re pretending he’s leonardo dicaprio (again.) plus it’s free. you must rsvp, all info here. it’s at humboldt and jackson streets.

get out there and spread that love. don’t let me down.

<3L.

the weekend guide | 17-20 november 2016

Liz Norment — Thu, 17 Nov 2016 23:03:31 +0000

the super moon and skyline.

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Ring the bells that still can ring

Forget your perfect offering

There is a crack in everything

That’s how the light gets in.

– leonard cohen.

Imperfect and shining. Cracked and resilient. Iridescent and strong. Take this feeling and momentum with you into the weekend, Brooklyn. Be more than you think you are, and always better together.

I’ve made a plan that I promise is all it’s cracked up to be. Come with me, won’t you? Your weekend guide is shining through.

THURSDAY

The Wild Honey Pie’s 7th Birthday Bash at Union Pool, Williamsburg.

so i have a confession to make- i want to be the wild honey pie. despite my generally sweet and definitively unbridled nature, and my tendency to respond quite well to a little heat, cornstarch, and when enveloped warmly in flaky pastry, i still can’t get in there. so, i’ll go to this. where there will be cake and games and performance and high brew coffee will have free coffee and coffee-infused cocktails to equally liven up and generally confuse your desired thursday night high. i’ll agree not to mind if you do. $15 all info here, 7pm-midnight, 484 union ave at union pool- pool me once, no shame in that.

Sensory Speed Dating, House of Yes, Bushwick.

because it seems now that dating decisions are decided by impulsive reactions based on 5 photos followed by the very few nerve endings in our fingertip as it swipes right. house of yes, as always, offers us a refreshing and edgy alternative to anything in our normal lives. thursday’s events welcomes a more obtrusive yet let judgmental dating option. that you want to do, just close your eyes and stick out your tongue and trust me. it’s sensory dating. rely on none of your senses, just your perception. described in such better ways here. (hint: hold on to the blindfold) $25-30 2 wyckoff ave AT house of YES, there all senses say YES.

Spanish Oil + Vinegar Tasting at Eastern District, Williamsburg, Brooklyn.

let’s be honest. there is always time for spanish wine because it’s always time for spanish wine. every waking hour. so when then do you make time for spanish olive oil and vinegar? eastern district in NoGreePo has our answer. thursday night, 5-7pm. free tasting of the aformentioned but oft-neglected delicacies. come interested, leave intrigued, then let’s all go get 2-for-1 or 4-for-2 G&T’s at el born to finally satiate or spark our spanish desires. 5-7pm at eastern district, 1053 manhattan ave. 5pm-toda la noche at el born, address. because you were el born this way.

FRIDAY

Glamdammit presents The Brats, at Gold Sounds in Bushwick.

to live in brooklyn is to live vicariously throughout so many decades of influential music and wish we could forget fashion statements. well let’s just embrace all of them, friday night. our funky fresh favorites at glamdammit! bring us the brats, contemporaries of blondie and the ramones and the new york dolls and kiss, to say the least. jam the fuck out and forget your age and the year and remember, only, the beat. and of course that time is fucking relative. free, all other info here. 11am-4pm, 44 wilson ave. at gold sounds, where silent isn’t golden.

Salsa Fridays at Subrosa, Meatpacking, Manhattan.

subrosa, literally beneath the rose, which is so everything that this club is and will be as soon as you arrive. just beneath the simple sweetness it exudes. stunning rhythm and subversive beats, and then your intentions will become nothing but hips and sweat and button downs. just go with it. live music, no cover. i’ll cover for you the next day. just DM me and express your need for an alibi. all info here. free every friday in november. 63 gansevoort ave.

the view from rooftop reds.

Closing Week at Rooftop Reds at the Navy Yard.

this is the last week for open hours at rooftop reds. which, if you haven’t been reading or paying attention or altogether drinking wine at subpar altitudes, you need to be there. the only urban winery in the greatest urban area, and the wines, even without all of this, would speak for themselves. add hammocks and sunsets and ladder golf and corn hole and it all adds up to no excuses. they’ll be open friday 4-9pm, sat 2-10pm. plus there’s a damn goo dsale on wine. all info here, find them at 4th st at the navy yard.

SATURDAY

this exists in queens.

NY Adventure Club ventures into Jamaica, Queens.

all of new york is always just at our fingertips. even the hidden parts, the ones that seem completely unattainable… you just have to seek them with an open heart and mind. and as chance favors those who are prepared, prepare yourself for this event with (none other) than the ny adventure club. venture to the absolutely breathtaking and aptly spanish-inspired loews valencia wonder theater, in jamaice queens. all info here, 11am-1pm. 16511 jamaica ave.

Night at the Museum, MoMa ps1, Long Island City.

just because the weather is cooling doesn’t mean that we have to stop living and loving (and not necessarily in that order) at moma ps1. they bring us one of many in their nights at the museum series saturday night. wander around the museum, get lost intentionally. become part of the art. let your imagination precede you and recede into the landscapes, the sculptures, the everything of it all. you are it and it is us, if ever. tickets, etc etc etc $15, 8pm-midnight.

The Derbi. at your favorite soccer bar, in brooklyn or madrid.

this is such a classic tale. the team with a lot of heart and no funding who is kicking ass despite all odds, against a behemoth that knows not its own strength nor how to properly use it and its strongest warrior has impeccable hair and eyebrows. suspiciously impeccable… just like every story in sports, right? or something? it’s atletico v real madrid in the motherfucking calderon and once again, both the title for la liga and (at this point) the champions league are so beautifully and viciously within our reach. put your jersey on. meet me at banter bar and lets bleed our hearts our. 245pm, 132 havermeyer st. AUPA ATLETI.

Brew in Motion, Green Space in Long Island City, Queens.

let’s be honest, beer drinking makes us want to move, but it’s usually a slow, sloppy, completely off-beat tribal type of movement. from a tribe we’ve never met. so let’s leave that up to the professionals, eh? saturday’s event (near!) ps1 in LIC brings us contemporary dancers maya orchin, trina mannino, and meghan frederick, and a showcase of everything they are oh-so-much-better-than-we-are-at. but that absulutely doesn not mean we can’t drink beers and very emphaticaly shimmy (link!) our shoulders in solidarity.homebrewed beers from andrew berman, alex dolginko, and matt frederico, plus a special coffee beer collab with bodega coffee. tickets $25, can be purchased here. the show is 430-730 pm at Green Space, 37-24 24th Street.

BROOKLYN BAZAAR, Greenpoint.

mmm do you have any idea how often I get sick of commanding, week after week, that you hit up the brooklyn bazaar? NEVER. I absolutely never get sick of it. Because the bazaar is a beautiful gift, one that keeps giving, and give to it we must. this weekend it invites you to come dance and boogie down all night with diet cig, adult mom, and THICK, and all the other funky magic you’ve ever dreamed of – in the form of foods and games and karaoke and all the best prizes. free entry, right at your fingertips. all other details waiting for you right here. 150 greenpoint ave at the brooklyn bazaar, get weird.

Elevation at House of Yes, Bushwick.

bring it back to the house of yes saturday night with satori’s monthly installation, elevation. it’s your best chance to make bad decisions this weekend to get there and be bad. it’ll feel so so good. tickets $25-40 purchased here. at house of yes- where they don’t take no for an answer.

SUNDAY

First Weekend at the Holiday Market, Union Square.

yep. you have plenty of time to do your christmas shopping but man i love snaking around this beautiful and fleeting institution in new york, browsling or buying, living and dying, inser everything else i seem to always say. wy don’t you get a leg up this year? and also decide to embrace the holidays even before indulging yourself in turkey and stuffing and what promises to be unavoidable political discourse. the union square holiday market opens …, hours, this is your second reason to cross the river this weekend (i know, i’ve changed.) (i hate myself.)

Vegan Thanksgiving Pop-Up, Haymakers Corner Store, Williamsburg.

thanksgiving for most people means meats, and to the turducken folks it means a lot of meats. that doesn’t mean that vegans shouldn’t be folded into the fun… come to the vegan thanksgiving shop up saturday to be celebrated and included for your meat misvings this thanksgiving. just as long as your’e giving, right? it’s noon-4pm 176 ainslie st at haymakers corner store, all info here.

<3L.

the (birthday!) weekend guide | 10-13 november 2016.

Liz Norment — Thu, 10 Nov 2016 23:06:24 +0000

when love is a whisper and hate is a roar it feels hard to know how to speak again, how to move again, how to be again.

no matter what side of the coin you fall on, we’re divided and it hurts and it’s hard to know what to do now. but the important thing is to hold on to this energy. to embrace our anger and concern. to move, to breathe, to demonstrate, together. and we can start in so many ways but the first is within our communities and our cities. get out, get going. don’t hide in your homes within the safety of your opinions. have every one of those conversations and maybe a laugh or two. see the other side or have a healthy debate. understand that there’s more that unites us often than divides us so let’s figure out how to do this together.

as with every week, i’ve found the best options in the city for doing just that. so hold on to me and hold on to each other and let’s feel better and make better and do better, together.

THURSDAY

Live Reading from The King of Greenpoint, TBD Bar, Greenpoint.

to know where you came from and where you’re going… new york is by definition a melting pot. and we are stronger and so much more intelligent because of our smattering of cultures and heritages and beliefs. but this place we have descended upon has a story and a heartbeat too, other than ours. so let’s hear about it and listen to it thursday night, at TBD bar. author geoffrey cobb reads from his book the king of greenpoint (of course not to be confused with the king of the bears of greenpoint). come learn about the life and reign of peter j mcguinness. a night of stories and beer and wine. free. 7-8pm, 224 franklin st. at TBD, where everything has already been decided for you we just know how much you like suspense

Southern Tier benefit for Homeless Pets, at Rosamunde Sausage, Williamsburg.

i have shed quite a few southern tears for homeless pets, even to go as far as to adopt one. which i wish he would remember… but alas. let’s instead concentrate on ingesting some southern tiers thursday night, and maybe a sausage or two at rosamunde in williamsburg. yep it’s a sausage and beer benefit, proceeds going towards in our hands animal rescue. come through and eat well and be merry. and save our furry little friends. more info here, 6-10pm, 285 bedford ave at rosamunde sausages (or did you say hostages?)

Ghostwriter Viewing Party, Videology, Williamsburg.

i want to shake the hand of whomever is in charge of making thinking up the events at videology. no fo real, who’s doing this? because i want to shake your hand. because i’m positive, ghostwriter, that it’s everyone’s favorite 90s series, errr, ~~2nd favorite~~ ~~3rd favorite~~ ~~4th favorite~~ ok one that you remember! ish! and HEY it was actually filmed in fort greene, so come get really really close to where it all started and celebrate this epic cinematographic movement at videology thursday night.308 bedford ave, 7-9pm, $5 at videology

Mortified at Littlefield, Gowanus

mmm. the only thing more therapeautic than talking about your most embarrassing moments is living vicariously through someone elses (you know waht i mean… we were all obsessed with that section of YM magazine…) hear it in real life, the-moth style, thursday night at littlefield. all info and tickets here. doors at 7, shows at 8. tickets, $10. 622 degraw st.

FRIDAY

Rubblebucket at Manhattan Inn, Greenpoint.

spike hill. glass lands. cameo gallery. aviv. manhattan inn. something in that list doesn’t belong, yet. which totally, totally, totally fucking blows. manhattan inn is closing and that means what we are losing one more of the complex and beautiful threads that weave this beautiful tapestry that is the reason and the lifeline of this people we call brooklyn. rubblebucket promises to send them out in style friday night. tickets you should get immediately RIGHT NOW HERE. ill be there. show starts at 630 and your RSVP DOES NOT EQUAL ENTRY. arrive early.

ROOTS Cafe Poetry Series, Park Slope

there is nothing better than the warmth of shared verse among virtual strangers. come to roots cafe’s monthly poetry series and feel enlightened, rejuvenated, inspired… and perhaps a bit more grounded (that was a root pun!) contributors and observers welcome. 8-10pm, 639 fifth ave. seek, here.

Adult Friction, Indie-Alt Dance Party at Over the 8, Williamsburg.

we young people are energized by a few things, but mostly friction on any level. the one that leaves us feeling empowerd and impassioned by a charged political atmosphere, and the one that consists of button downs and heat on a friday night. make friday night be a perfect storm of both, plus [tunes spinning from] LCD soundsystem and basically all the dope artists they’ve inspired. it’s an indie-alt dance party. get in there and let it rub off on you. at over the 8, 594 union ave,

Free Fridays at Subrosa, Meatpacking District in Manhattan.

we live in this city to embrace culture and be embraced by said cultures. notably, on friday nights in basement clubs with sweat and hip movements and live bands and alive hands. and things like that. yep. it’s subrosa friday nights, and they’re free all month and yours for the taking. plus it’s your only reason to cross the river this weekend so cruciamos. party starts when you get there… but basically at 10pm. all info here. 63 gansevoort st.

SATURDAY

so a little thing is happening this weekend that i like to call MY BIRTHDAY.

i wanted to take this perfectly lovely fall weekend to show you how to spend an ideal birthday weekend in new york. with all of your best friends and like maybe your dad or something doing all of my favorite things but not aging a bit, of course. so come along and i dont know, maybe bring a gift that i’d like or something. (seriously, you’re invited.)

Fall Colors Picnic in Central Park

the leaves they are-a-changin and they’ll all be bare and gone before we know it. so let’s embrace that giant piece of nature and magic that the ancient gods of the city placed before us and have a real autumnal picnic in central park. and do those little boats that i love. bring wine and cheese and everything else you want to be there. starts at noon.

Virginia Tech plays Georgia Tech

my team is 7 and 2 folks. it feels like the good old days again and we are all hopeful and passionate. and ready to ramble some wrecks from georgia tech. come join in the spirit of american college football and beer drinking at keg and lantern. kickoff is a 330.

Tapas and Paella at El Born, Greenpoint.

yep. when people have birthdays, especially of the decadian significance, they want to share good foods and great wines with the best people. and maybe pretend a little bit that they are in spain. have all of this and so so much more saturday night at el born. hear me gush about it here more than a piping hot croqueta then come. 8pm. 651 manhattan ave.

OTHER non-birthday festivities include:

Bloody Mary Battle, Villain, Williamsburg.

so you have to really really like bloody mary’s. or need a reason to justify getting really really fucked up friday night other than THAT REALLY OBVIOUS ONE. saturday brings you a round of hangover cures in rather epic and disjointed proportions at the bloody mary battle. some bartenders battle it out to bring you the best mix in the city of this boozy gazpacho. i mean hey it doesn’t sound bad but there is truly only.so.much. tickets, 45-65, are available for purchase here. and there will be food there but it will be extra so you better hope that your bloody mary has a little something in it that even comes close to the two VERY BEST in the neighborhood and probably the whole entire world actually hey let me just save you the trouble k cool BYE. (50 N 3rd st.)

Imagine This: Women’s International Film Fest at the Wythe Hotel, Williamsburg.

the theory of opportunity- it can be created but never, ever destoryed. simply translated and embraced and empowered. so this weekend, it’s a good time to scooop up and empower some of that opportunity that may have been perceived as lost. at they wythe hotel, in the form of “imagine this”, a women’s international film festival focused on celebrating, uplifting, and encouraging creative projects by women. all info is here, fest is saturday and sunday, 11am and 8pm. tickest $10-45. 80 wythe ave.

Renegade Craft Fair, Metropolitan Pavilion, Manhattan.

where crafts are dangerous again! head to the met pavilion to peruse among booths and tables of patiently created and curated goods that are guaranteed to charm the pants right off of you. which of course is fine because there are plenty of hand-crocheted undies to keep you covered. make it til you break it then you buy it. saturday and sunday, 11am-6pm, everything else you need to know is here.125 W. 18th St.

Fall Hall Bar Crawl at Union Hall, Park Slope.

you know what sucks about bar crawls? their over-ambitious tendencies and inevitably sloppy endings and where-the-fuck-did i leave my debit card and overall tendency to bring you to your knees. on a crawl. WELL not this one! a humble yet hopeful 3-bar crawl in park slope brings us thorugh union hall, (others) for a just-tipsy-enough-but-still-standing adventure. tickets and info here, 702 union st. at union hall where you must fall before you crawl.

SUNDAY

Intro to Graffiti Class, Bushwick.

i don’t know if you guys have ever tried your hand at graffiti, but from what i hear it is a hell of a lot harder than it looks. especially at 5am after being at house of yes all night. and for some reason choosing that wavy metal siding as your canvas. anyway, regardless of your circumstances, it never hurts to practice. so that when you get caught red (or blue or purple) handed, you at least have some artwork to show for it. this class in (yep!) bushwick teaches you how and helps you define your own style. $70 gets you in. and apparently, $200 gets you out, so just don’t get caught. bitch. all info here, 1130-1pm, 110 troutman st.

Second Sundays at Pioneer Works, Red Hook.

red hook’s darling pioneer works brings us their monthly series of open studios, live music, and site-specific interventions… plus musical performances, djs, their open-air market and sculpture garden in the backyard and a unique look into the inner workings of this beautiful living gallery and communal artist workspace. 4-10pm, $10 suggested. all info here. 159 pioneer st. at pioneer works- the first of its kind!

<3L.

the weekend guide | 29-2 october 2016.

Liz Norment — Thu, 29 Sep 2016 20:27:14 +0000

Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.

…and then let me see if I can’t turn things around for them?

this quote of course is inscribed on that proud little lady in the right side of this photo I captured, but all the rest of the content is taken straight from the lady sitting behind her little laptop. or perched upon her bicycle, exploring the city in search of a better weekend for us all. I too have been called somewhat of a beacon of hope, a statuesque stronghold, the greatest gift france ever gave to america.

i will let you decide what, if any, of those things are true.

in the mean time, embark on a good honest weekend. i’ll be here, constantly vigilant.

AHOY, brooklyn. (ahoy.)

THURSDAY

so if you haven’t been to the new bazaar then this image makes no sense to you but if you have well then… i’m sure we are well acquainted by now.

Lagunitas Brewing presents a dope free show at the Brooklyn Night Bazaar, Greenpoint.

from the people who put the “pub” in public radio, who make the best IPA in this nation budding with hoppy competition, and the “lagunita” in the little lake of peepee you tend to make after having too much beer, lagunitas brewery comes to the brooklyn night bazaar thursday with a free event. why? because since the bazaar was moved out of its space, shows can only be free when (kind-hearted) sponsors who also sell dope shit come along to help out. unlike that other “sponsor” who did the opposite of helping out. so let’s all go and have beers and see self defense family, jesus piece, pawns, and glory. 7pm, all info here. 150 greenpoint ave at the night bazaar.

Swatch Party at Good Room, Greenpoint.

NO ONE WANTS TO BE IN YOUR STUPID SWATCH CLUB.

but i mean if it’s a party at good room, i’ll do what i have to do. come to this. i know nothing more about it, but it’s thursday and friday and well… i’ll be swatching our for you. 98 meserole ave. at good room – where you don’t have to be bad to get in but… nothing feels better.

Tainted Love, 80s Dance Party at the Bell House, Gowanus.

this tainted love you give… it’s so, so much better than no love at all. let’s go move it and shake it at the bell house for 980s dance night, the cure for well… thursday nights with no love at all. event is free, 10pm until the love runs out. or the taints come out. either way, i ain’t gonna be caught with my pants down. info here. 149 7th st at the bell house – you rang?

FRIDAY

Bob Moses at Terminal 5, in that rather shitty area of manhattan.

two reasons to go to this show – 1. bob moses is dope as shit and his music toes that stunningly listenable line between r&b and electronic, soulful beats and laid with languid harmonies. 2. imma be there homey. and this chick too. tickets. here. show starts at … if for some reason you still ahve doubt, well nevermind then don’t go. but if you want to listen and get pumped up before the show here. at terminal 5- where every beginning feels like the end.

60 Shots for 60 Shorts Power Hour at Creek and Cave, Long Island City.

i don’t know about you, but i never want to do a power hour again. i mean really – there are so many more inventive ways to get fucked up than chugging shots of beers and ending up bloated and burpy and completely sauced at some frat party. we’ve all grown up and maybe, the concept of the power hour also has. (also, this isn’t to be confused with the hour of power… of course). party boys chris donahue and … compiled 1-minute shorts by 60 comedians for your viewing and drinking pleasure… and between each act you have to take a shot of beer. or you know, just laugh and sip. and be called a fucking weenie. tickets and info here, $5. show and beer drinking begin at 10pm. 10-93 jackson ave, at creek + cave.

Dave Chapelle’s Block Party “Screening” (but actually it’s another party) in Fort Greene Park.

OUTDOOR MOVIES AREN’T DEAD. they’re just chilled out a bit.

let this be a lesson, to all of us. just like spike lee and dave chappelle, and bill murray’s appearances, when you make something big of your life, come back and have unannounced amazing parties in brooklyn. dave chapelle did this in clinton hill, the area where he grew up, back in 2004 and invited tons of awesome pals. see the documentary film about the night and the man himself right in the ‘hood where it all went down (and sorry, but doesn’t it seem like this is just going to become another “random” block party?? YEP. i’m not missing it this time and neither should you.) here’s how not to miss it. 645-845pm, fort greene park, myrtle ave and st. edwards st.

Glass Animals at Music Hall of Williamsburg.

is sold out both nights.

just wanted to dig that knife a little bit more, that’s all.

let’s commiserate right next door at one of my favorite spots in williamsburg, cubana social. 70 N 6th st. live music, killer mojitos, and some of the best empanadas in town. #glassanimalswho #jkstillfuckinghurts #bad

Richard Avedon, Moving Image, Exhibit at the Cadillac House, SoHo.

if you aren’t familiar with richard avedon’s unbelievable life’s work of stunning photography, then just trust me- you want to go to this exhibit. besides it’s your only reason to cross the river this weekend. avedon’s portraiture is unnerving and monumental. he would photograph celebrities for hours on end, having them sit or stand and vaguely pose until their exhaustion and annoyance took over and finally that moment where the humanity leaked through the facade and SNAP. there it would be. oh and also- he was easily the authority of fashion photography for his 60-year career. see some of his stuff here and then head QUICK to the final night of his exhibit at the cadillac house, 330 hudson st. 10am-7pm. info and such here.

SATURDAY

NYC Beer Tour, Brooklyn Kitchen, Williamsburg.

What is it about adding a layer of education and full facts into your drinking habits that makes it all feel a bit more noble? “I toured three breweries in Richmond Virginia this weekend!” Is something you can totally tell your mom. “I got so completely shit housed on beers I can’t quite tell yiu what city I was in, I just know someone shuffled me to the bus station and put me on a greyhound due south and I’m calling you from a pay phone outside of ….” Simp,y is not. In the spirit of learning and helping to justify our inebriation, check out the NYC beer tour at Brooklyn kitchen this weekend. Learn all about beer history in our humble metropolis, plus how it’s made, tasting notes, and of course more about our budding and flourishing beer local beer culture. $40 tickets and more info here. 100 frost st.

OKTOBERFEST

Yep, this isn’t Múnich. but this city still celebrates Oktoberfest with the best of them, with plenty of beer gardens and large beers in boots and people who like to drink and German immigrants. Your best options in Brooklyn are:

Brouwerij Lane, Greenpoint.

celebrate Saturday at charming yet annoyingly named brouwerij lane in greenpoint. 12+ specialty brews. free sausages and pretzels and joy. German vinyl spinning all day. Leiderhausen very optional but you do you. Starts at noon. 78 greenpoint ave at Brouwerij Lane – you don’t have to say it, we know how you feel.

The Hall at MP Taverna, Williamsburg.

Yeah I know. This place looks a bit like a holiday inn dining area from the outside. But, the “hall” and backyard have been bringing Williamsburg a constant flow of pretty dope events since its inception. Saturday is no different- celebrate Oktoberfest with sausages and pretzels and booze and songs. oh and by the way p, the MP stands for Michael Psilakis so haters can try and hate, you know this food is amazing. Party goes from 6pm on into the night. tickets, $15-35 all info here. 470 driggs ave.

Liima at Baby’s All Right, Williamsburg.

they’re a side project of danish group Efterklang, which of course, should explain everything right? well regardless, these guys have an awesome sound and if you know anything about that stellar back room at baby’s all right you know that it was made for this type of sound. just listen to “you stayed in touch with the wrong guy” loud and tell me you aren’t dying to go to this show or to fuck. or do both, just one before the other, k? $15, tickets here. 146 broadway. doors at 8.

Ghostbusters Screening and Mallow Roast, Videology, Williamsburg.

you just can’t get enough bill Murray can you? have s’more, in the form of a ghostbusters screening and backyard mallow roast at videology. tickets, $5 and all other info here. 308 bedford ave. stay puffed, brooklyn.

SUNDAY

Bulletin Market’s closing weekend, Williamsburg.

Ah yes, another thing we’re losing to the relentless grip of wintertime. the charming bulletin market in that space on driggs and north 7th. live music, chic artisanal things, food trucks, dranks, hammocks, oversized soccer pool. yeah. so let’s spend most of the weekend there, and go down with a ship. 510 driggs. love you so much, i’d take a bullet(in) for you man.

so glad we have an understanding.

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so glad we have an understanding.

Pier 6, Brooklyn Bridge Park.

a floating land of enchantment. head here before it gets too cold to lay in the grass and admire martin creed’s work with the stunning nyc skyline in the background, plus playgrounds, dog parks, a sustainable garden on a barge that offers classes and demonstrations, public tours of a rad old light ship, and epic sunsets. every night. all info here. then bike down to all my favorite spots in red hook.

Lagunitas Beer Circus at Coney Island.

what up, lagunitas? you traverse the country to bestow your graces upon Brooklyn and decide to throw two dope events in one weekend? I dig it. it’s a throwback circus of epic proportions. 100+ performers from burlesque to old school freak shows and aerialists; 7 bands lined up, plus limited edition lagunitas brews, and food trucks. come in costume, join the spectacle. drink brews. tickets, $40. high noon-5pm, in the mcu parking lot. all info and tickets here!

World Maker Faire in Flushing.

just like the world’s fair of our fathers, over 650 inventors and tinkerers and thinkerers and you. go to this. just thinking about it makes my bells and whistles all AHOOOGAH and my sprockets steam and my eyes bug out, like that guy up there. $35/day, $65 weekend pass. everything else here. 47-01 111th st.

SUNDAY

The Last Tiki Disco, in Bushwick.

we bid you a solemn and hopefully farewell, tiki disco. oh keeper of our summertime souls and all of those memories we have strategically forgotten. let’s get it in one more time this sunday at 261 moore st. this site is more informative than mine is. www.tikidisco.com/

And we’ll be waiting here for you, of course, right where you left us. (forever.)

Mister Sunday Still Lives on in Ridgewood, Queens.

But hey good news! mister sunday is still happening, so we should all go.

Looks like we’ve separated the men from the boys now in the battle of Brooklyn outdoor sunday parties. Come see..

at nowadays, 56-06 cooper ave.

Oktoberfest also Lives On at The Habitat, Greenpoint.

holy shit, you still want to drink more big beers? and sing big songs? and eat big sausages? you savage animal! you wiley wildebeast! you positively preposterious platypus! (why are you still reading this) (also you’re not alone) info here. Oktoberfest continues at the habitat- where all beasts find a home.

i love you brooklyn. with my whole heart.

<3L.

the weekend guide | 1-5 sept 2016

Liz Norment — Thu, 01 Sep 2016 21:48:47 +0000

we work hard in this city, and that’s the beauty and downfall of new york- no one is here because they just ‘ended up here’. we’re here because we have something to believe in, to fight for, to work towards. and well, we’ve come a long way, baby. and it’s about time that someone recognized it. this labor day weekend, let’s reap the fruit of our labors. let’s weep for the labors that we’ve had to put in just for our fruits to blossom. and then die. before we could even retrieve them. let’s experience everything that this city has to offer beyond the confines of our cubicles! let’s close our laptops and leave our to-do lists undone and not even put up an out of office and let’s never look back brooklyn.

(are you picturing me on a soapbox in front of the statue of liberty holding a bottle of champagne with a slight tear in my eye?)

(oh… well, are you doing that now?)

ok you unimaginitive little beasts- lighten up and read on.

and let’s fucking get to work.

THURSDAY

Thursday Supper at the Farm on Kent, Williamsburg.

sure, maybe it feels to early to celebrate the apple harvest, but it seems that our dear corporate companions did not hesitatated to stuff mini crunch bars and plastic jackolanterns and pumpkin spice everything down our throats just after easter. SO, let’s gently start our fall harvest celebrations with something beautiful and wholesome and pure. thursday night brings us a cider dinner at the beautiful north brooklyn farms. dine outside with pre-fall bounty from the garden and cider pairings from aaron burr cidery. **ATTN** these dinners are sold out for the next few months, so go to this one tonight, 7-1030pm. tickets, here – $100 gets you an unbelievable meal, cider pairings, and one of the few unobstructed views we still have of the east river. 320 kent ave. QUICK GO GO GO. cider?!?! i ‘ardly knew ‘er!

New York Salsa Congress, all over the city, all weekend.

with all of the club-bumping we lose ourselves into each weekend, celebrate instead this stunning form of artistic expression. this weekend is the annual new york salsa congress, featuring free lessons, showcasing some of the greatest salsa dancers from all over the world, hours of open dancing with live bands and each night offering an after party that starts at 3am. nothing is more captivating or seductive than salsa dancing, and i guarantee it will heat up in a much better way than the panther room at output. events schedule, tickets, and a bunch of other stuff to get you pumped found here.

Archestratus Blue Plate Special, Greenpoint.

this week’s sicilian family dinner at archestratus was, at press time (and maybe until you arrive!) TBD- which means that you are going to have to go on the faith that everything is magic inside of archestratus and family-style dinners in nogreepo are always a good idea and paige knows what she’s doing. (that’s a pretty good bet) 7-10pm – full plates and homemade bread, alcoholic bevvies for sale. 160 huron st.

FRIDAY

Black Rock Brooklyn at House of Yes, Bushwick.

are you sick of all of the mystical and dustily epic burning man images from all of your friends this past week? i’ll be honest, i’m not. but, i can’t keep from imagining myself in some rainbow-bright-meets-the-rocketeer-meets-the-rockettes-esque costume zooming around on my bicycle-turned-batmobile-turned-aladins-magic-carpet. lets turn all of those pure imagination-fueled images into reality and burn it down together at the house of yes friday night. it’s a burn event for all of us who could’t make it. there will be costumes and playa bikes and more black lights and wild decor than ever and also all of those things you think you could expect at burning man itself. but then we all go home at the end of the night, or to an after hours party… up to you. free before 11pm, or tickets $15, here. 2 wykoff ave. at the house of yes- where they don’t take no for an answer.

Grand Opening, Greenpoint Fish + Lobster, Long Island City.

for all of the wonder and fishy enjoyment and oyster tacos and raw bar delights that greenpoint fish co has been bringing to us for the past 3 years, it’s time we shared a bit of love with our neighbors to the north. greenpoint fish + lobster opens a long island city outpost that promises to offer more seating, some grab and go options for you laborers, plus all the best specials and taco tuesday with a gansett deals you know and love. grand opening is friday. go celebrate, then go back. so i can have my motherfucking spot back at the greenpoint location. (hey! just kidding! come sit with me!) 5-43 48th Ave at Vernon Blvd.

The Last Fireworks of the Season at Coney Island.

the worst things about summer ending? the sidewalk simply doesn’t replace the boardwalk. getting a hot dog from a hot dog stand feels desperate, not noble, and not as easy to blame sudden loud noises on fireworks with a hopeful smile. (man that got depressing fast) well let’s get our last fill this friday at coney island. sun, sand, fireworks, hot dogs, bearded ladies and bearded men! roller coasters! baseball! skeeball! skeezy balls! come onnnn! last fireworks show of the season starts at 930pm, at W 10th st at coney island. all other events and cool things, here.

Mets vs Nationals at Citifield, Flushing, Queens.

come meet the mets, and me! at the mets game. i’ll be signing autographs and giving you exclusive weekend events access, plus plenty of BiT schwag up in row 528! come on down! and then up! game starts at 705pm. helmet nachos start at 706pm. at citifiled, tickets, here. take me out to the ballll game! or wherever… just as long as you take me out.

Rule of III Pop-Up at Duke’s Annex, Greenpoint.

that little room of requirement attached to duke’s liquour box (which is room of requirement in and of itself) opens its magical doors again friday night and keeps them open, all september long, for “rule of III” a pop-up assemply of handmade fasions, beauty, and wellness experiences by local brooklyn creative collective. come by and be inspired, be transformed… then get a little bit of whiskey and get friskey. opening is friday, 12-9pm. 170 franklin st.

First Friday’s with El Jefe’s Nachoria at The Diamond, Brooklyn.

nachos cheese torched before your eyes, just after they ask for it. because they are naughty nachos that give themselves away for free. go, partake. i won’t tell anyone. nachoing begins at 730pm. beers run all day, all night. 43 franklin st. get tipsy and chipsy. then maybe a little lipsy. (just not in poughkeepsie.)

SATURDAY

Makossa Cookout and End of Summer Party, Output Rooftop, Williamsburg.

yeah i hate to say it, but summer’s ending. get a little closer to the sun to say your goodbye’s this saturday on output’s rooftop for the 6th annual makossa cookout, featuring khalil, max glazer, and an afternoon full of other friends. this is such a better alternative to electric zoo. tickets only $10 available here. 74 wythe ave, 2-10pm

Mike Birbiglia’s Thank God for Jokes, and Don’t Think Twice- in Brooklyn.

didn’t get to see the moth story slam a the bell house but you still want a piece of that charming sarcastic wit from mike birbiglia? well good news. he’s doing standup tonight and his new film, don’t think twice, co-written with ira glass and featuring a hell of a lot of other voices (with faces this time!) you’ll recognize, plays at the nitehawk everyday this month, standup, tickets, here. tickets to any nitehawk screening here.

Washington Square Outdoor Art Exhibit, Washington Square Park, Manhattan.

a damn good reason to cross the river this weekend in washington square park. it’s a museum al fresco with the bi-annual outdoor art art exhibition, featuring artists from all over the city and all over the world. go, take in some art. get inspired and feel better about the rest of your weekend, and all of those projects you promised you’d get a start on with the long weekend. now is the time. do them. (just after you check out all of this art.) all info here. sat-monday (plus next sat + sun!) enjoy the beautiful and blossoming fruits of their creative labor this labor day.

SUNDAY

Lucky #8 – Burmese Pop-Up Dinner from Myanmar at Baby’s All Right, Williamsburg.

burmese pop-up from myanmar at baby’s all right- dinner! no rsvp needed

i know, i know. i pretty much only think of baby’s all right as that place where i’m always sweating and dancing like mad in that backroom with the rad lights show to some band i love or have just fallen in love with. well, they do dinners! yep. and dare i say our relationships with baby’s all right have evolved a bit. let’s join them sunday night for lucky #8, a burmese pop-up. there will be , , , and there might certainly be some sweating. and dancing. all info here, first come, first serve. 146 broadway. you aight, baby? yeah… baby’s all right.

Riis Beach Bazaar, Jacob Riis, The Rockaways.

guys guys. it’s the beach bizarre. which came about when the night bizarre was ousted from their greenpoint outpost, but now it will be reinstated, next week! so let’s go and celebrate the last weekend of this fabulous … turned institution. free entertainment and all of your favorite food vendors and drink mixers and friend. plus sunshine and sand all day.

Electric Zoo After Party,

you’re an animal. and you know this. and just because you didn’t go to electric zoo does not mean that you can’t party with those electric animals, after. if you want. and just between you and me, i bet you most of their electricity will have shorted out by this time of the evening (if you know will) (and i know you will), so hey- go to this. you’ll have a lot of room to move those hips on the dance floor and it will be easy to catch the bartenders attention with your fresh gaze and astute soldiers. it’s all happening at output. info and tickets here. 74 wythe ave at output- where you have to put out to get in.

The New Moon: A Guided Viewing Experience at The Hollows, Williamsburg.

can’t teach a new moon old tricks it seems. that’s why we need to all head to the hollows sunday night, for a guided viewing experience for this new moon phase. come for a 30-minute program followed by a viewing of the new moon. bring your own telescope or binoculars or use theirs… i secretly hope once we all loo through our viewing devices it’s just a fresh butt on the other side. but hey, that’s just me. all info here, sunday night, 9-10pm, 151 bedford ave. at the hollows- where you never feel empty. the hollows- where everything sounds like a bellowy greeting. (they’re trying to choose a slogan that will stick. feel free to leave your vote in the comments box below!)

MONDAY

oh BABY. take a deep breath, ok? we get a free motherfucking monday to do whatevver the hell we want. why? because we labor. because we work. we do not have to today. donate to your union, put all your wages in your pocket, and let’s celebrate, come with me??

West Indian-American Carnival, Crown Heights.

labor day might be a very american holiday, but trust me, you don’t want to miss this. the west indian-american carnivale in crown heights is everything you want this labor day. there will be music, there will be dancing, there will be art, there will be a hell of a lot more colorful feathers than you thought you’d run into on a monday (or i mean maybe less, i don’t know what you do.) this carnival is celebrating it’s 86th year in the city and you need to be a part of is this time. all event info can be found here, and you will find me there. 11am-6pm.

Labor Day Dance Party at The Farm on Kent, Williamsburg.

that’s right baby it’s a good old fashioned labor day hoe down on the farm. except this farm is filled with hipsters (and let’s be honest, plenty of hoes) and it’s in the shadow of the williamsburg bridge and the bluegrass trio has been replaced by dope djs and you will actually enjoy being there. all info here, 2-10pm, 320 kent ave. come, let’s boogie.

this is what we’ve been missing. every monday.

Summer Mondays at Zurilee Park, Lefferts Gardens.

yep, somehow i’ve missed this. all summer. i’ve let you down, brooklyn, and i’m sorry. but i’m not hanging up my hat, not just yet. apparently all summer zurilee park has been handing out free beers plus having mad cool dance parties with all-night happy hour deals and dope pizza. and djs. in a fresh as fuck backyard. and i haven’t been going, and neither have you i bet. so let’s go to the last and pretend like we’ve been there the whole time. “wow, i’m surprised they chose these pizza toppings for the last bash!” and “mmm, this must be the 82nd free zurille beer i’ve had this summer!” anyway, whatever we’ll make it work. monday. if you really need to know more than free beer, i guess click here. 230-11pm, 755 flatbush ave. at zurilee- a place i haven’t been. yet.

beaches and belches.

Labor Day Beach Party at Videology, Williamsburg.

ah yes and then of course this non-beach beach party at videology. this is the beach party for all of you excuse makers who aren’t going to make it to the beach. and you pale people. heyyy, i’m kidding. this is going to be a cool party and everyone has their reasons for not hitting the beach. let this be yours. tropical cocktails and beachy films all day, all night. party starts at noon, info here, 308 bedford ave.

Go to Jacob Riis.

ok fine then, go to the beach today! the beach bizarre is still there, waiting for you.

getsummered one last time. (make it count.)

really hope that guy is there.

House of Yes Labor Day BBQ, Bushwick.

i know this doesn’t surprise you. there’s an amazing all day barbecue and party at house of yes monday. because it’s labor day and if you’ve ever walked by one of their day parties, that massive and beautiful sound system draws you in like a moth to a flame or a hungover hipster toward a really loud day party. monday’s event is all we’ve been working for, guys- hot meat, dirty dancing, good vibes, sunshine. grills. america bandanas and hats and hearts. arrive before 4pm to get in free, tickets available here and at the door also (all of this was confusing to me, just go if you want to go.) 2 wyckoff ave. because it isn’t a ~~holi~~day without a massive event at house of yes – where they put the affirmative into all the action.

*i just wanted everyone to notice that the music is TBA and the food is TBA yet all rsvps are sold out. yeah. it’s an outdoor barbecue and party and they haven’t even said anything about the music or the food and it doesn’t even fucking matter. house of yes, give me some of that magic. i’m fucking serious man. give it to me. 2pm-2am.

Image processed by CodeCarvings Piczard ### FREE Community Edition ### on 2013-11-19 17:22:24Z | http://piczard.com | http://codecarvings.com

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looks pretty enchanting already.

#screendoorofenchantment at Reclamation Bar, Williamsburg.

this event promises that “you will be transported to a far away land within brooklyn”… YES. i have no idea what this is. absolutely no clue. but you know what i do know? i will take the secret door of enchantment in hopes that it leads me anywhere other than being hungover and sunburnt and angry at my desk on tuesday morning. i won’t even look back, not once. let’s go together. 8pm-midnight at reclamation bar,

there isn’t any information on it but here is a website. go on, click away. unless you’re john nash there are no other hints there. 8pm-midnight, 817 metropolitan ave. at reclamation bar- a place for scavengers.

phew i don’t know about you, but all of this celebrating the fruits of my labor has left me… well, fruitless. and ruthless. and a bit empowered to quit before the harvest. and move to bali. ya dig?

(let’s go.)

<3L.

the weekend guide | 18-21 august 2016

Liz Norment — Thu, 18 Aug 2016 20:21:57 +0000

ok folks let’s check in here. it’s august 18th- how many hot dogs have you had this summer? at what shade is your summer skin? do you know where your unborn children are? well not to panic here or anything but TIME IS RUNNING OUT. get out there and make some bad decisions and get a sunburn and smother yourself in mustard. and then rinse off in a chilled rosé shower. and then jump in the ocean, or hug a stranger or I DON’T KNOW ok? but i’m panicking. let’s all take a deep breath of this hot luscious august air and attack these last few weeks, together. with our sweaty palms squished tightly against each other.

come with me. and don’t you dare look back.

THURSDAY

the break vintage will break you (without leaving you broke)

Happy Hour at The Break Vintage, Bushwick.

maybe your ass has been all over bushwick, but here’s a chance to leave your mark. and to drink free rosé. and to get mad discounts on amazing vintage. how is all of this possible? because when the break vintage has an end of summer sale and they add free wine, washable body paint, and thongs to create beautiful butt art. on the walls. this is how we do things here in brooklyn, and trust me- this event will be all its cracked up to be. 574 bogart st, #312. 5-8pm, info here. the break vintage is trying to break your heart. just like wilco.

REVEAL at the Warsaw, Greenpoint.

the warsaw is an old polish national house in greenpoint where you can see everything from monsters wrestling, community bingo night, and progressive musicians doing progressive things. thursday night will transform the cafeteria-event hall into an exhibit showcasing the best current and local artists in film, fashion, music, art, performance and everything else it says in that handy graphic above. there will be a runway show, a medley of live music, interactive visual art galleries and living hair and makeup statuettes on pedestals that will make you question hair, makeup, and humanity. go to this event and be amazed at the limitless nature of art and performance. tickets, $20 can be purchased here. hang up the hooligan garb you normally wear to the warsaw, it’s cocktail attire. so get fancy. 7-11pm, 261 driggs. info and tickets here. because nothing says raw like cocktail dresses and human statuettes.

Pizza Night at Archestratus Books, Greenpoint.

it’s nothing new to have odd conglomeration/fusion of things in this city- we’re pressed for space but not for creativity. so north greenpoint’s bookstore-bar-restaurant-eventspace is bringing you everything you’ve ever wanted in one charming little space. thursday night is monthly build-your-own-pizza night with 20 locally procured toppings to choose from and chef allie laporte of wilson daniels to give you a wine pairing for your unique creation. $16/pie, beer, wine, and vermouth for purchase. 7-9pm. all info here, 160 huron st. at archestratus,

LONDON, ENGLAND – AUGUST 1: Ricardo Santos of Brazil jumps to serve the ball as teammate Pedro Cunha watches against Martin Reader and Joshua Binstock of Canada during the Men’s Beach Volleyball preliminary match between the Brazil and Canada on Day 5 of the London 2012 Olympic Games at Horse Guards Parade on August 1, 2012 in London, England.

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men’s beach volleyball at the london olympics.

Olympics Viewing Party and Photography Exhibit, Brooklyn Museum, Prospect Heights.

if you haven’t taken the opportunity to tune out all of this political bullshit and celebrate america and watch the olympics, there is hope for you not. and you are a curmudgeon. for everyone else, come watch the olympics in a rad sculpture garden and then be moved by the photography exhibit Who Shot Sports, a collection of prolific photos from the olympics, 1843-present. 8-10pm, free, 200 eastern parkway. info here.

FRIDAY

Out for Drinks with Orr Shtuhl at Archestratus, Greenpoint.

i remember my first beer. and have a feeling that i will remember the one i have friday night, at archestratus, but i gotta be honest- i’ve forgotten a hell of a lot of the ones in between. make and share some memories at everyone’s favorite bookstore in NoGreePo. Orr Stuhl shares his love of beers, brewing, and the persistance of memory- and how alcohol inevitably affects it. $14 includes a beer, all info here, 7pm at archestratus books, 160 huron st.

End of Summer Party, Bushwick Public House, Bushwick.

it’s mid-august in brooklyn, not september in ibiza. there is absolutely no need to promote everything as if it’s the last weekend and we’re never going to see sunlight or bare knees again. however, that does not mean we should hesitate to celebrate sunlight and bare knees. and do so with all of our closest friends and a slew of impressive fucking djs (DJs Simon Sez, Ella Hu$$le, Reez, and Beazy Hype) at the bushwick public house, for free, on friday night. 1288 myrtle ave, the bushwick public house- they put the lick in public(k).

Love Muscle at the House of Yes, Bushwick.

nothing should surprise you anymore about the epic and out-there events at the house of yes. friday’s musings bring us love muscle, which of course is a dance party with massive interactive sculptures. that you can climb on. in costume or in the nude, if you so choose. it also promises psychedelia, amazing conversation, sacred geometrical lamps (you can’t tell me those aren’t rad as fuck). go to this. and be the naked one climbing the sacred geometrical lamp, ok? just promise me that. free before 11pm with rsvp or $15, tickets and info here. 11pm-4am 2 wyckoff ave. love muscle at the house of yes- where you don’t have to strong arm me! it’s always yes.

SATURDAY

LIC Block Party, Long Island City, Queens.

it’s so important that we support or neighbors to the north, and they make it mega easy with events like this. live music! interactive performances! arts and crafts to buy or make! artisanal foods! bespoke cocktails! hint: this is everything you like, and it’s for all ages! so you know… those friends of yours who you’ve shunned because they had babies can come. or keep shunning them. up to you. all info here, noon-5pm, purves st & 43 avenues. i’m going to this but between you and me, that street name gives me the willies.

so relieved to see a food picture that was not perfectly styled. albeit a bit corny… they really through the hammer down on this one (is that a phrase?) and. it’s a real mash up. (i’m done.)

Brooklyn Crab Festival at Mirrors, Williamsburg.

pinch me i must be dreaming! crabs in brooklyn? this photo says it all, but if you really need more of my words… well, that is rather shellfish. it’s crabs, and a good old fashioned cajun boil. there will be beers too. and other things to drink. here is a pulsd deal you should use and here is all the other info. 284 grand st at mirrors, where all your reflections are grand!

this picture makes me sad and doesn’t fit in on this page.

Plant a Fall garden, Wyckoff Farmhouse Museum, Flatbush.

mmm, do you know what the really good thing about fall is? and no it’s not the fucking pervasive presence of faux-pumpkin flavoring hemorrhaging aggressively out of everything that tasted familiar just a week ago. and it’s also not the slow and visceral covering of the knees, shoulders, midriffs, hearts as we all regress back into being strangers. it’s vegetables. new ones, especially for the season. find out how to grow them yourself and create an urban garden to bring a bit of cheer to the changing of the seasons. $8 tickets here, 1-3pm at the wyckoff farmhouse museum, 5816 clarendon rd.

Bulletin Market Pop-Up, Williamsburg.

because all of our blacktops should be markets before they become something sad. be happy this weekend at the bulletin market in that sacred space on driggs, before its replaced by granite countertops and mundanity let’s not take it for granted. driggs and n. 8th st. check it out and rsvp here!

The Enchanted Realm of Rene Magritte, Governors Island.

because the only way to get inside his head seems to be to get outside your own, governor’s island brings us a uniquely immersive dive deep into the complex subconscious of rene magritte, surrealist visionary and artistic genius. or mad man. of which there is little difference, of course. the exhibit runs through 25 sept but go now. $15 tickets and info here, at house 17, nolan park, governors island. one thing you won’t regret this weekend- magritte.

PS1 Summer Warm-Up, Long Island City.

This LIC summertime party institution also has a permanent residency on my weekend guide, from now through labor day. so i recommend checking the schedule and either choosing based on the tunes or your own availability (this is not a “oh i have a few hours, i’ll check it out” kind of affair. it will take all of your saturday and at least 3/4 of the mental space of your sunday. and it will all be worth it.) tickets here. i’m already heatin’ up.

oh and don’t forget to check out the tent of secrets, located in the back of the arboretum in the sculpture garden.

this is the tent of secrets.

Full Moon Festival, Saturday AND Sunday! Governor’s Island.

ok you know the drill at this point. it’s summertime in new york which means epic outdoor festivals that combine live music, djs, dancing, art installations, culinary delights, inventive and intrepid cocktails… it’s where all of your dreams come true. this one comes with a cosmic bonus- the motherfucking august full moon. this is how you embrace summer. go go go go GO. (go.) tickets and schedule here. moon me, swoon me.

SUNDAY

Play (red) Hooky, Sunday, at Redhook.

(this is a Brooklyn, I’m Trying sponsored all-day event)

in case you didn’t know, there’s a brooklyn themed putt putt course in red hook. yeah, there is. and it’s indoors. and its interactive. so sunday, bike down past the river, pop in and go kayaking (fo free!), get crabs while drinking beers and playing cornhole, then cool off indoors at this brooklyn adventure land and pop into the world’s greatest dive bar before you head back up to gowanus for chances with wolves, at threes brewing. this is your sunday. embrace it. and look for me. (find me and get free crabs!) (that was both inappropriate and also false!) (you’ll get a beer!)

Chances with Wolves at Threes Brewing, Gowanus.

this is the greatest dj duo in brooklyn, spinning at my new favorite brooklyn brewery. you must go. and you must dance. because you miss 100% of the chances you don’t take, especially if wolves are involved. 333 douglass st. 2-8pm. at threes brewing- i’ll try anything thrice.

or, here are your other sunday options…

Bikini Sundae at House of Yes, Bushwick.

if’ you’ve ever gotten icecreams at jacob riis and then ran across the beach in the hot hot sun to deliver them only to arrive with two cones and a body covered in stickiness and sprinkles, well then, you basically have sunday’s event at house of yes. except there will be dancers and djs and likely more than one sticky situation. but never fear, as a fundraiser they will be offering car washes, bike washes, or body washes to help support their new human suspension system. (can you write that off on your taxes as a charitable donation?) yep. so that about sums it up. sunday, tickets here, 2 wyckoff ave at the house of yes- where

MCA Day, Littlefield, Gowanus.

come to the 5th annual celebration of one of brooklyn’s finest, at a party he would have planned himself. music! art! spearkers! charities! neighbors! friends! and it’s totally free. come, celebrate. all info here at littlefield, 622 degraw st.

(and now let’s all escape to the beach and skip work tomorrow and a thousand other tomorrows too)

<3L.

the weekend guide: 28-31 july 2016.

Liz Norment — Thu, 28 Jul 2016 20:20:11 +0000

things we know: it’s hot. and it’s the weekend. and we pay way way too much rent to let anything get in the way of enjoying the last days of july. every time you complain about the heat, remember those things we so amicably refer to as “sleeping bag coats“. and then have a sip of rosé and get movin’.

ah, not sure how? i have an idea or two…

THURSDAY

Brooklyn Screams for Ice Cream! Brookyn Historical Society, Brooklyn Heights.

the future and history of icecream. well, it’s either in my belly or about to be in my belly… let’s see if the brooklyn historical society can expand upon that (and knowing them, they damn well can.) come hear about icecream, see about icecream, learn about icecream, and have some too. rumor has it they will be offering hypotheses on the future of the cone, one of the only edible food containers born out of pure necessity. tickets, here. 128 pierrepoint st. i’ll stop the world and melt with you. thursday night.

Dreamcatcher Workshop at Line and Label, Greenpoint.

oh-oh dreamweaver, i believe you can get me through the niiiight by winding and twisting around me just so tightly and leaving woven into me pieces of your heart and your hopes and your dreams.

that’s my ballad about thursday night’s craft event, from the perspective of a feisty little wooden hoop. for more in this series, words as a wooden hoop. kindly find something else to read.

thursday night. brooklyn i’m trying darling Line + Label is having their FIRST and certainly not their last (i suppose pending the improvement of relative press coverage) craft event. make your own rad dream catcher and prevent those lucid aspirations from escaping ever again. plus look mega hip around new lovers and native americans. 568 manhattan ave, 5-8pm, $50 includes all materials. rsvp- info@lineandlabel.com, all other info here. love me, leave me… just don’t weave me.

look at these brilliant scientists, contemplating… their next tecate.

Drunk Science Presents: Outerspace at Littlefield, Boerum Hill.

My Very Excellent Mom Just Served Us Three Drunk Comedians Talking About Space, at this charming little event space in south brooklyn. thursday night welcomes the debauchery of drunk science as three hipsters, rather predictably, pose as experts on just about anything and try to drunkenly convince a group of people why. in this case, they try to present their best dissertation about outerspace to a panel of real scientists and astronauts and one secret alien among them. tickets, $5, available at the door. all info here. 8-930pm, 622 degraw st. just tryin’ to cop a little field. baby.

David Byrne and other heads, talking… at Good Room, Greenpoint.

and you may ask yourself- this is not my beautiful good room. this has transformed into a panel discussion by some of the most progressive movers and shakers in the music industry. and then you may go to good room to see them. and you may be equally starstruck and inspired. and you may (you may!) bring that big oversized shoulder-heavy suit out of the closet and everyone will be totally cool with it. or like, mostly cool with it. the good room hosts david byrne, ryan schreiber, matthew ogle, and emilie friedlander friday night. 730-10pm, free; all info here. let’s all go, because it’s about time we all do something good for once at good room.

FRIDAY

Cruel Summer- 80s Dance Party at the Bell House, Gowanus.

the only thing cruel about summer is when it leaves us. so don’t let it leave us. go and revel in everything its about, 80s style- so make sure you donnasummer outfit. at the bell house. 149 7th st. and as they say- if your ears are ringing, you can find them at the bell house. (and you should keep better track of your ears.)

Salchipapas VI at Archetratus, Greenpoint.

archestratus is such a fantastic enigma to me, and just exactly what this neighborhood needed- without knowing it yet. at the intersection of food and stories, words and bites, poetry and digestion. that’s where you’ll find archestratus. friday’s event brings a latin american street-food tradition of meats and greets and… streets. and also storytelling and poetry and music, all curated by roy hunter. more info here, 7-10pm, 160 huron st. street meat and greet, a great state to mate!

Campfire Fridays, Riis Park.

the beach bus is nice. coney island is… well, iconic. but how do you embody the feeling of being in a beach town when you reside in the sprawling metropolis that is our city? you go to campfire fridays at riis park, you bring your own instrument or vocal chords or clapping hands and you sit and you drink and you sway and you pretend not to notice the silhouette of the skyline fading into the distance, instead only seeing the fractured moonlight skipping along the waves. every friday, hosted by texas transplant lorena leigh everything you need to know is here, 7-9pm, 16702 rockaway beach blvd. kumbayanhavabeer.

SATURDAY

Birre Ballz Happy Hourat Archestratus Books, Greenpoint.

it’s like everyone wants us to feel good about our alcohol intake this weekend by offering all sorts of incentives. guys, GUYS! we’ll come anyway! just for the beer! saturday at archestratus books, you get a arrancine ball with every beer. and that means a hell of a lot of rice at the rate we’re all going, and there’s nothing wrong with that. 2-7pm at archestratus books, 2-7pm, 160 huron st.

Puppies ‘n Pints at the Knitting Factory, Williamsburg.

my constant struggle on the weekends is the detachment i feel, equally, from either my incredibly adorable pet or the relentless day party scene here in our borough. saturday you can have both. fuzz and suds. barks and brews. adoption and inebriation. good decisions and bad decisions and then all good decisions in the end. come play with pups and get a little loose and think that maybe now is the time to have a pet. because this city is cruel and tough, and these little sugar bears wouldn’t dare judge you for the relative size of your apartment or for falling asleep naked with your shoes and the light on. (unless you speak dog. in that case, they’re just like a jewish mother.) all info here, 1230-330pm, $12 tickets here. 361 metropolitan ave at the knitting factory- where everything comes together!

PS1 Summer Warm-Up, Long Island City.

oh and don’t forget to check out the tent of secrets, located in the back of the arboretum in the sculpture garden.

this is the tent of secrets.

Kickstarter Summer Festival! Fort Greene Park, which is in Fort Greene.

you’ll get a kick out of this. everyone’s favorite small business launch pad is holding a summer festival the only way that kickstarter could- with non-pokemon games, DIY arts + crafts, artsinal food booths, art installations and performances, creators, installators, innovators, alligators! oh and plenty of sunshine. 5-11pm free, fort greene park, myrtle ave and north portland st entrance. all info here.

Harry Potter Midniigh Release Party, Word Books, Greenpoint.

UM, so not too old for this. so so not. harry potter midnight book release party at Villain http://www.villain-llc.com/, complete with boozy butter beer and other themed drinks, wizardy games, and magic, of course. $29.99 gets you in the door and a book in your hand at midnight, followed by hours of wide-eyed page turning. party starts at 10pm, tickets here, 50 N 3rd st. #mudbloodsdoitdirty #acciobeernahmsayinnnn #babyimhowlerinforyou #youaremypatronus

Techno Overboard- Good Room Boat Party, Greenpoint and onto the high seas!

all i’m saying is that there’s only room for one boat party this weekend- for all of our health. and if i had to choose, it would be saturday’s techno overboard. what do you get when you put the good room on the water? bad, bad things. tickets, $25 here. boat sets sail from the world’s fair marina at 6.30 and we party all the way to greenpoint. all info you need is here. world’s fair marina 125-00 Northern Boulevard. the good room boat cruise- where seasickness would be your best outcome.

RINSED Coke Yacht, Hells Kitchen and onto the high seas!

listen, don’t shoot the messenger. or, you know, pass judgements on the messenger’s extracurricular activities because of an event she’s reporting about. yes, i know what this event is called but that by no way means that there will be any illicit activities happening on said boat nor will i be aware of have anything to say on the subject otherwise. but what i (and you now) know is that rinsed throws the dopest underground parties in the city, and nothing is more underground than those that are floating on water. in a boat. with your friends and rad djs and an afterparty at a shitty club on the west side that we will all commandeer and sail that ship way way way way way into the sunrise. tickets, here, but they are going insanely fast i hear. so get yours and get there early because i hear there are going to be long lines.

The One Night Only Recurring Dance Party at McCarren Park Hotel Rooftop

hey it’s that one night only party that happens every month. you know what that means? treat every fucking time like the first and the last. it’s rooftop pool party weather so make no excuses. get down to dj sets from the so so glos and bikes in the kitchen while you get up to no good. 10pm-2am, free. there’s no info just show up at 160 n 12th st. see you there, you little pork pie you.

SUNDAY

Dusty Rose Vintage Sidewalk Sale, Greenpoint.

In a neighborhood that suddenly has become defined by the prevalence of vintage shops (and i don’t hate it.) this one must be my favorite. sunday they pull out old lines, slightly flawed, or simply pieces they are sick of having around all from local makers and sell them to you at rock bottom prices. they are dusting off that made in brooklyn up charge and this simply doesn’t happen. get there. 251 greenpoint ave, noon-4pm at dusty rose vintage, where a rose by any other name wouldn’t be dusty!

Summer Camp Comedy, Alphabet City.

sundays are for hugs, laughs, and greasy foods… especially of the free variety. head to summer camp comedy at hifi bar sunday for a guaranteed 2 out of 3 of these things, and i bet you can squeeze a hug out of someone. 169 ave a, 730-930. hahahahahaHA.

Salsa Lessons at Brooklyn Bowl, Williamsburg.

a, hangovers- don’t they just make you want to cuddle up in bed with the lights off and netflix streaming? (or whatever it is exactly that netflix does?) well, resist. must i remind you that it is the last weekend in july? summertime is leaving us. get out there. here’s a good way to spend sunday getting a little close with someone, and learn a new skill, move your body, and get-to-know-each-other-if-you-know-what-i-mean. and-i-know-you-do. salsa dancing lessons with a live band- the williamsburg salsa orchestra, at brooklyn bowl. $5-8, 8pm.

go forth, young brooklynites

and weekend.

<3L.

the weekend guide: 2-5 june 2016.

Liz Norment — Thu, 02 Jun 2016 19:22:32 +0000

things i’m doing this weekend… that don’t include gov ball, but do include going to all the way more rad gov ball after dark parties (lots of which you will find listed below) and also hijacking kayaks (“hiyaking” as they refer to it in the biz*) (the biz of watercraft heist) and weazling my way into the actual fest. governors island may have been a former military base but let’s just say they have left a lot of permeable boundaries and i will see lcd soundsystem. me and all of you. on our kayaks. if you’re tough enough and interested, please let me know in the comments section below. and let me know what your tribe name will be for the mission. mine is kitchen mama, so if you wanted that to be yours, you best find yourself another mission.

only one kitchen mama here.

anyway VAMOS with the weekend plans! here they come!

THURSDAY

Artgasm Collaborative Painting at House of Yes, Bushwick.

it’s thursday. and no better way to shed your “i’m a semi-serious professional adult who deliberates over big decisions and manages my finances” faux exterior than to, well, mask it. with paint. and then to use your honest body to contort and collab, to dance, to twist, to sit and meditate. and you know, maybe have a drink or two whilst aerialists dance overhead. confused? me too, but not enough to keep me away from artgasm at the house of yes- where they don’t take no for an answer. tickets, $15. party is 6-9pm at 2 wyckoff ave. don’t paint me ’cause you aint me.

Lucy Dacus and Sam Cohen at Rough Trade, Williamsburg.

SO much good music this weekend!! and this will kick us off. richmond native lucy dacus is like a hybrid courtney barnet meets stevie nicks meets all the slightly dark and witty ironic lyrics you’ve ever heard but make you feel good instead of bad. and she’s from my motherfucking hometown. playing a rad show with houston-born sam cohen who is everybit as deep and synthy as jack white, with an extra dose of raw dynamism that is borderline addictive. GO see them. doors at 7pm, show’s at 8, $12 or the cost of sam cohen’s album gets you in (with the album too!) 64 N 9th st, i’ll trade you rough for so much smooth.

Tiki Party, Brouwerij Lane

i neither know what this is about any more than i have any clue how to pronounce the name of this place. what i do know is this- they have a damn good selection of beers, a hip backyard, and if you’re lucky you’ll get a sighting of the old neighbor climbing up the back ladder with a bag of produce in his mouth, breaking into his own apartment. and you’ll think it’s pretty dope. come tonight to a tiki party with rockaway brew co, wear a hawaiian shirt and get a free pint! 7-10pm, 78 greenpoint ave, there is no point in clicking on this link because it hasn’t been updated since the 90s. just trust me, there’s an event there tonight. k? free plus the cost of beers. and tears.

Cabaret Under the Archway, Dumbo.

this weekly series hits every thursday night, june-sept, under the iconic brooklyn bridge archway and brings you a variety of shows ranging from all types of world music and dancing, dj dance parties, puppetry, improv theater, and plenty of beer and wine to help you blend it all together without missing a beat. this thursday presents a sultry cabaret and is totally free, 6-9pm, 20 jay st. it’s more than water under the bridge at this point.

Gov Ball After Dark: Bob Moses at Output, Williamsburg.

GAH if you see one gov ball after dark show, let this be… the one that kicks off all the others. bob moses happens to be the title track to my latest playlist and on top of that the guy is creating some of the best soulful dancey beats i’ve heard in a damn long time. he plays output thursday night, and we can all cheers govnah to that ish. together. just so you know, these tickets sold way way out and then they released more right here. so get yours right now. 74 wythe ave, 10pm-4am (sweet jesus).

FRIDAY

listen i don’t know what’ up with friday nights lately, but it seems that brooklyn is all but trying to convince us to stay in. however, we will not. here’s are your best options tonight:

Rooftop Reds Urban Vineyard, Vinegar Hill.

yep, that would be a rooftop winery right in the brooklyn navy yard, started by 4 dope friends and offering free tours, rooftop yoga, pop-up dining experiences, and a ton of events you should start sipping on now. or, friday rather. tastings and tours noon-9pm (come right after your summer friyay release), at the navy yard, 4th st, fill ‘er up.

Gov Ball After Dark: POLIÇA and Solid Gold, Brooklyn Bowl, Williamsburg.

being one of my favorite bands to listen to real loud in a car, i can only imagine how amazing poliça will sound in the space at brooklyn bowl- oh wait, or i’ll just hear them actually do it on friday. because they are playing tonight’s gov ball after dark show and their techno-infused cacophony is just enough to make me want to close my eyes and throw my arms around and lose it completely. 61 wythe ave, doors at 11, show starts at 1130. it seems that all of the links to the tickets are broken so… i don’t know. just show up. fuck the polic(a).

go to your favorite dive bar if you don’t want to do either of those things. my picks? lake st, ontario bar, the diamond.

SATURDAY

RINSED’s Annual Coke Yacht Boat Party, The Hudson River.

hoUSe Exhibit and Interactive Installation, Governor’s Island.

part of a multi-event series on what it means to make a house a home, head down to governor’s island to (i just realized this is during gov ball? THIS IS OUR IN.) (don’t tell anyone… we’ll just “make ourselves at home” and shit) enter into abandoned army barracks where you’ll be encouraged to leave your mark via paint, pens, markers, or whatever medium you choose and interpret the feeling of coming to the US in a space that we depended upon to keep intruders out. let out your grievances or rejoice among strangers, let this me your litmus test on your current place in our wondrous and oft unpredictable nation. and feel free. (then let’s go dance ourslves clean, if ya know what imean). 1-4pm, nolan park 8A. see you there, homie.

Renegade Craft Fair, East River State Park, Williamsburg.

where crafts are dangerous again! head to east river state park to peruse among booths and tables of patiently created and curated goods that are guaranteed to charm the pants right off of you. which of course is fine because there are plenty of hand-crocheted undies to keep you covered. 11am-7pm, every saturday in june, but this is the kickoff so all the goods will be extra fresh. east river state park, 90 kent ave. make it til you break it then you buy it.

LIC Food and Flea, Long Island City, Queens.

my heart will always be with smorgasburg but damn that ish is overrun now. check out our near neighbor’s to the north’s response- the LIC food and flea, the still semi-undiscovered younger brother of smorg. all your favorite vendors, and just as many waterfront views. 11am-6pm, 5-25 46th ave, (what is it with everything in queens seeming to have a range of addresses? what?) yumyum eat em up.

Fête, Williamsburg.

this event is so emblematic of all of the things that i love about brooklyn and how it seems to flawlessly combine everything under the sun into some artful fusion performance or painstakingly crafted cocktail or selectively curated small plate… other cities consume their entertainment one single event at a time- we throw it all together, give it a non-descript name and a formerly abandoned and likely condemned location and then go to an after party. Fête is an immersive performance, street festival, and interdisciplinary live art with a casual party vibe, in an abandoned bank. it’s artists producing artists producing art producing your entertainment on saturday. 1241 bedford ave, 8-midnight, tickets, $10 in advance, $15 at the door.

The Freedom Party, Industry City, Sunset Park.

if you’ve been to industry city in the past 18 months then you know that this charming industrial river-front alcove is blowing up faster than… well, every single other square foot of our precious borough is blowing up, which is damn fast. head over for their kickoff of this weekly dance party, before it gets mega lame. 6-11pm, 638 2nd ave, freedom isn’t free- it’s $20. tickets here.

Gov Ball After Dark: Day Wave at the Knitting Factory, Williamsburg.

and this is where you will experience governors ball after dark, and after you experienced sneaking into it and relishing it and nursing your sunburn after it. here, at the knitting factory- they’ll have you in tsitches! (i know… i’m working on the slogan, ok? taking suggestions below in the completely empty comments section.) day wave hits the stage and hits you with all of his indie-rock-electro-pop magic. midnight, tickets $15, 361 metropolitan ave.

SUNDAY

Rocco’s Annual Pizza Eating Contest, Rocco’s Pizza (and just outside of it), Bay Ridge.

it’s summertime and that means new york begins it’s season where eating warm and savory foods in excess and as fast as possible is celebrated and encouraged. well, i mean, just the hot dog contest and this- rocco’s annual pizza eating contest in park slope. live band all day plus drink deals and pizza that you can eat at your own pace while watching some other people eat entirely too much pizza entirely too fast. event is free, but i’d use the bathrooms before the contest begins. because. oy. 7818 fifth ave, 1-4pm. fold ‘er over, get it in.

Big Thief Record Release Show at Mercury Lounge, Bowery.

you knew it was coming, but did you know it would be right here waiting to close out your weekend of pinnacle audible musings? well. then. i’ve still got it! here’s your reason to cross the river this weekend– big thief, alongside tiny hazard, twain, and sam evian, plays mercury lounge and will absolutely captivate you. and also promises to fill your sleepy little head with pleasantly raw folky tunes as you drift off into the desk chair land of ergonomics and spreadsheets. (dammit.) 7pm. tickets $12, 217 e houston st.

go forth, faithful readers. and look for me. i’m out there.