things i’m doing this weekend… that promise to include sunshine, booze, and rooftops in dangerously imbalanced proportions.
come along, then?
Bastille Day Celebrations
Dinner at L’Antagoniste, Bed Stuy.
Bastille Day Party at Baby’s All Right, Williamsburg.
i did enough bastille celebrating on sunday to have been speaking fluent french and playing the accordion by nightfall (or at least, i’m pretty sure that’s how it all happened) BUT, the actual day is TODAY. francophiles and french ex-pats units together to celebrate freedom and champagne and baguettes and berets and the best place to do it, tonight, is dinner first at l’antagoniste at 10 malcolm X blvd in bed stuy- participant in french restaurant week and all things …., and then dancing the night away at baby’s all right, 146 broadway in williamsburg. make a reservation here and all party info is here. choose your fête.
Ice Cream Festival, Museum of Food and Drink, Williamsburg.
i scream, you scream, we all scream because it’s a motherfucking ice cream festival at the museum of food and drink. what does that mean? who the hell cares! use your imagination! icecream sculptures, hot fudge pollack-esque tapestries, surrealist landscapes of icesream cones that are actually and metaphysically melting, plus a cafe with iceacream, straightup. (that was an example of how to use your imagination… i cannot promise thatany or all of those things will be present, but just go to this event.) tickets $20 here, 630-8pm at the museum of food and drink, 62 bayard st. i’ll stop the world and melt with you.
Humor Writing Class, Bryant Park Reading Room, Midtown Manhattan.
humor doesn’t come easy to some people. and for those people, there is help. whether you want to write your own comedic screenplay, satirical novel, or just tell better jokes- come to this free class in partnership with gotham writers’ workshop and start making people laugh. i of course will be taking the evening off from instructing. but i trust you’ll be in good hands. 7-830pm, register here, bryant park reading room at 40-42nd st.
Bottoms Up Beer and Yoga at The Well, Bushwick.
well well well, what do we have here? looking to get all twisty with some ladies (and you yourself are a lady…?) this girls pint out event welcomes all levels of drinkers and yogis. $20 gets you a class and your choice of… well, one of over 60 craft beers. but you’ll be all loopy after all of the twists and clamps and inversions so it’s kind of like you get 3 beers and a new perspective. tickets here, at the well, 272 meserole st. bend it don’t break it.
Funny, Sexy, Sad #3 at Molasses Books
a new reading series that’s like the moth, but storytellers must share something that will make you catch your breath- from laughing, crying, or well getting vaguely turned on in an audience of strangers. the art of storytelling never dies for lovers, fights, and raconteurs. find the plot here 8-10pm, 770 hart st, get a hart on.
The Future is Now, a Sci-Fi Dance Party at the House of Yes, Bushwick.
dance into another dimension and feel ok, for once, about suddenly noticing everyone around you looks a bit alien-ish. take a deep breath and go with it. friday night, a sci-fi dance party of other-worldy proportions. tickets, here. 2 wyckoff ave. at the house of yes– where space travel is an affirmative, captain.
The Persistence of Nudity- A Burlesque Tribute to Salvador Dali,
his paintings are interpretive, addictive, sensual and subversive. and burlesque at the beach brings you a multi-sensory experiential tribute to his works that opens up all the corporal drawers of your subconscious to leave you breathless and misplaced, for the first time, again. friday night, 1208 beach ave, tickets $15 right here. “Take me, I am the drug. Take me, I am hallucinogenic.” – the man.
CHANCES WITH WOLVES, Baby’s All Right, Williamsburg.
if you don’t already know how i feel about these guys, then you don’t know me and you should work on your reading comprehension. the best dj duo in brooklyn, and to see them these days is a bit of a rarity. they join friends sonny & the sunsetsfriday night at baby’s all right tonight at 10pm fo’ free. which is fucking ridiculous. 641 classon ave, you miss 100% of the chances you don’t take. and 110% if wolves are involved.
The 2016 Water Games at The Well, Bushwick
no one grows up, they just act older because they feel like they have to. case in point: this event, at the well, saturday. adult water balloon fights, water gun battles, djs, dancing, and other things to get wet over. $10 gets you a beer and 30 water balloons and a handful of new enemies. bring your own towel, water gun, and aim. yes there’s a dry tent, yes there’s a request to respect those who don’t want to get wet. yes, for those that want to stay dry there are a plethora of drier options to participate in on saturday. #fuckthedrytent 272 meserole st, 3pm-?? tickets here. the well- where if you get trapped in it, you don’t cry. you fucking dance.
We Are Here- a response concert in honor of Black Lives Matter at National Sawdust, Williamsburg.
because sometimes the only response you can think of to everything happening in our country right now is to put your hand to your heart and close your eyes and wish so badly it would all just stop- this concert, as a response to black lives matter, offers a way to interpret all of the sadness, despair, and inevitably to expose the realities that we have trouble swallowing ourselves. $ all proceeds go to the families of delrawn small, alton sterlino, and philando castile. tickets $20, here. doors at 930pm, show starts at 10. national sawdust, 80 n 6th st. let the music heal you, and let the healing mobilize you.
Bike Fetish Day, Greenpoint.
fetish (n); an inanimate object worshiped for its supposed magical powers or because it is considered to be inhabited by a spirit.
that object is your bike, and the spirit is you, dear friends, fellow riders. let’s face it- everyone has a fetish. and it doesn’t feel so subversive if you are experiencing it not in some dark underground new york club with your work clothes stuffed in a locker and a safe word tucked in the front of your twisted mind, but at an outdoor festival. with bikes. and bike enthusiasts. there is truly nothing more inexplicably magical than riding a bike. let’s all go celebrate it in greenpoint on saturday at the city reliquary, noon-6pm, on havemeyer between hope and grand. i’ll be there with my bike and other friends.
Party Like It’s 1865, Greenwood Cemetery, South Slope.
so here’s what i know. there was a man buried in a really fucking fancy mausoleum in greenwood cemetery back in 1865 and apparently he was the OG. he frequently visited the mausoleums before being interred there and put on some wild ass parties. and now they are honoring him in the creepiest of ways with some fire breathers, contortionists, and a dark-ass creepy good time. at greenwood cemetery, 500 25th st, 7-10pm. tickets, $37 found here. where mah ghouls at?!
Po-Po’s Fest at Archestratus Books, Greenpoint.
after a 16-hour nonstop flight to taiwan, me and @hannahea88’s first stop in taipei was to a morning food market. why? because taiwan effectively became a tour de foods and we had never heard of such a thing- a morning market! little did i know that… well, there’s one coming just down the street from me. this weekend. so let’s all go together and i’ll annoyingly whisper in your ear that this isn’t nearly as good as taipei BUT- i bet it’s a damn close second. ish. tickets and dumplings and all things lovely, $37 here. 160 huron st– you always know yer on huron when… you’re actually on huron.
you know the arts and craft shack at camp was just a creative thatched roof cover for naughty hand-holding and yarn restraints. let’s recreate that, as if for the first time, and add some fucking liquour. sunday, at magick city, 37 box st. where crafts are edgy again!
and then, we sleep brooklyn.