an urban lifestyle + travel blog by liz norment.

Tag: bushwick

The Weekend Guide | 23-26 February 2017

in CULTURE, weekend guide
can i tell you something? i don’t want to say it too loud, so lean in.
come on, get closer.
(i think that winter is over.)

YEP. i said it. and that means a few things here:

  1. we have got to stop listening to that groundhog for our seasonal weather reports.
  2. let’s throw all of our scarves and hats and cloves into the back of the closer and strip away layers of clothing along with our inhibitions and throw caution to the wind.
  3. meet me in the park and let’s drink until the sun goes down then dance on a rooftop until it greets us again this and let summer start within us, to hell with what the calendar says.

and so what if we’re wrong? if it gets cold again and then we can’t find our gloves and hats? let’s believe it and live it right now. because that’s why we live here, to squeeze every moment and extract a more significant life out of the fruits of our labors.

and in that case, consider me a juicer, baby. because i’ve squeezed out all the best ways to get after it this weekend and i’m serving it to you in a cool and frothy glass, ripe and ready for the drinkin’ and i call it your weekend guide.

drink up, it’s all here for you.



Hand Pulled Noodles of Xi’an at MOFAD, Williamsburg.
pronounced “Chee-yan” (yep, you’re welcome.) if you’ve never had the pleasure that is Xian’s famous food, do yourself a favor and go now, and often. the only thing better than every single thing on their menu is the homegrown story of how it all came about. because we could all use a reason to believe in the american dream again… head to the museum of food and drink for a look at their story, pulled straight from the heart hand heart.. tickets and info here, $10 630-8pm.


Two Step Lessons at Threes Brewing in Gowanus
step 1 – head down gowanus. step 2 – get pulled onto the dance floor semi-unwillingly for a two-step lesson. step 3 – drink what threes been brewing three times. 4 – feel loose and git your two step on. 5 – repeat, repeat, threepeat. lesson starts at 845pm, blue steel starts at 930 and won’t stop until you stop steppin’. (so don’t stop steppin.) all info here333 douglass st at threes brewing – i’ll try anything thrice.™


Rusted Root at Brooklyn Bowl, Williamsburg.
all i need is food and creative love and also rusted root reminding me how good life is just down the street at brooklyn bowl thursday night. they play along side flow tribe. they’ll send you on your way for $20. tickets and all other info here. 61 wythe ave.



Dolly Parton Lookalike Contest at Mable’s Smokehouse, Williamsburg
everyone’s favorite neighborhood smokehouse is throwing a contest of precisely their caliber. equal parts charm and trash, class and kitsch, my only complaint is that this contest completely discriminates against brunettes. i could absolutely kick ass at this if i was, of course, naturally endowed with light hair. ANYWAY, you don’t want to miss this shit. plus if you didn’t know, they have a bourbon iced tea that will knock your socks off (in the best way) and free peanuts. that you shuck on the floor. to enter, email free to attend, drink specials all night. additional info here44 berry st. 


Private Party with Rinsed, somewhere in Bushwick. 
ah, rinsed. i blame you for my insatiable hunger for mischief… or, a certain variety of it at least. the secret-dingy-warehouse-where-we-go-hard-all-fucking-night variety. if you haven’t been to one of these parties, you haven’t been listening to a thing i’ve been saying the past year and a half. the best music, the most insane installations, and near impenetrable level of anonymity. go friday night. tickets and the info they want to tell you is here. 10pm-welllll into saturday.



DJ Bengey at Union Hall, Park Slope.
you know that good dance music and a good venue big enough for all your moves but intimate enough for all your bad decisions is goddamn hard to come by. well, the master of ceremonies of exactly such a place is back and wants to see you. and you. and you too. all gettin’ down with your bad selves. DJ Bengey returns after a long(ish) hiatus to make your saturday nights better than your memories of last weekend are. midnight-4am, all info here,  702 union st.


Galactic Fundraiser for Planned Parenthood by the Wild Honey Pie, in the Bronx.
your reason to cross the river this weekend is for a galactic gala, an outerspace-themed fundraiser with music from jukebox the ghost, rubblebucket and pronoun sponsored by (big surprise) our good friends at the wild honey pie. with your $100 ticket you also get a meal with all the fixin’s, open bar and silent auction, and knowing that your saturday night activities went toward something good- all proceeds go to support planned parenthood who desperately need our support and attention in these desperate times. tickets and info here #revelwithacause 841 baretto st at lightbox-NY.


Good Room turns 4! Anniversary Party in Greenpoint.
can you believe it’s been 4 whole years since the good room was born from the remains of the old club europa? 4 years of us partying our asses off, all night, to some of the best house music this town has to offer? 4 years of finally finding a worthy place to do bad things? well, let’s commemorate it all friday night by celebrating such an epic anniversary and of course pretend that we haven’t aged a bit. taakaki itoh and iori spin tunes all night. $15, tickets and info here. and hey brooklyn, here’s to 4 more years of being bad. 98 meserole ave.


809 Project Fundraiser at Bar Matchless, Greenpoint.
while we are all riled up and resisting and fighting for so many things we took for granted before the toupeed cheeto took office, let’s make sure we’re also using this momentum and passion to help people outside of our country who are in need. saturday night at bar matchless in greenpoint come jam out to 7 bands as part of the 809 project, a cross-genre arts festival that helps raise awareness and funds for issues in the dominican republic. saturday night’s event goes to support the dream project, a non-profit focusing on early childhood education and development. tickets are only $15 and are available here. 7pm, 557 manhattan ave #revelwithacause


Super Powers Dance Party at House of Yes, Bushwick.

the atmosphere at house of yes has us all feeling like we have super powers. aerial acrobatics, extracurricular habits, pink rabbits… and those bathrooms. let’s all dress the part saturday night at their super powers dance party. come dressed as your favorite super hero, comic book character, or just wear something wacky and make up a name, an ability, an adventure. their all-resident dj lineup is guaranteed to have you movin’ all night. free before 11pm! tickets and other info here. 2 wyckoff ave at house of yes means no means yes means no means yes, yes  yes.™



Indigo Shibori Workshop, Space98, Williamsburg.

don’t dingy whites make you want to dye. ME. TOO. come learn the ancient practice of shibori dyeing with beezie’s textiles this sunday at urban outfitters space98 and leave with new and revamped textiles and the ability to turn any fabric into a deep indigo dream. oh also- they will have drinks. they’ll supply you with one towel (kind of like the gym. but, nothing else like the gym.) bring your own clothing to breathe fresh life into and use fabrics, tools, and dyes provided. $65 tickets HERE. noon-3pm at space98, 98 N 6th st. wine and dye me, baby.


ah yes, it’s OSCARS sunday! check out my top neighborhood picks below and drink all of the champagne you can handle. because why not. #campaignforchampagne


The Diamond, Greenpoint.

i love this bar. and you should too, if for no other reason than their reference to “dark lord cheeto” on this poster and the fact that there will be “oscar meyers in blankets” at the party. and, of course, the 7-minutes in heaven gondola out back. this is the oscars party you want to go to. starts at 6pm. all other info here. 43 franklin st.


Northern Territory, Greenpoint.
if you haven’t checked out the greatest meryl streep themed instagram account ever, do yourself a favor… then do yourself a flavor of the women herself at northern territory sunday night. their oscars party is in collaboration with the ‘gram and in celebration of the ‘streep, so treat yourself to drink specials and a chance to win some streep goodies pre-show starts at 7pm, admission is free. 12 franklin st. 


Humboldt & Jackson, Williamsburg.

so you wanna get fancy? you still don’t have to cross the river. head to humboldt & jackson’s oscars party. get glammed out and walk the red carpet (for real), participate in a best dressed contest, document how good you look dressed up in their photo booth, and win raffle prizes. plus drink specials and oh yeah, the oscars.  you can watch them here. rsvp required, do so here now. party starts at 7pm. 434 humboldt st.



you’re all winners in my book.



The Weekend Guide | 9-12 February 2017

in CULTURE, weekend guide

we’ve been fighting, brooklyn. fighting to live, fighting to survive, fighting to navigate this concrete jungle we landed our vicious hearts into, fighting stubborn landlord tyrants who have somehow been placed in positions of great power in this city. fighting.

and all of this fighting, of course, is from the intense and immense free-flowing love we have abounding from our hearts, moving our feet, stimulating our minds, helping us come up with really charming slogans for our blogs. and as love fearlessly and relentlessly trumps hate, let’s use this weekend of love to make a difference, to see a difference, to insight a difference and of course to simply make love. revel with a cause, brooklyn. and love with a purpose (not a porpoise) and make love, be love, spread love…

it’s the brooklyn way.



Grand Street Restaurant Week, WIlliamsburg

ah, restaurant week in new york. highly anticipating and seemingly a great way to have a new experience for a great value! and then you get there and it’s overrun and the food blows and everyone is on top of each other and you order too many drinks to deal with your frustration and then you’re paying way way more than anticipated for a mediocre experience. which i guess is also exactly what it’s like living in manhattan. let’s just do this ish our own way. it’s grand st restaurant week, and just as every time you’ve ever subbed one experience for another across the river, it will be so much grander. 12 amazing restaurants, it’s happenign through the 12th. all info you need is here, including menus! along grand st. 



Matthew E White and Flo Morrissey at Baby’s All Right, Brooklyn. 
it is so so easy to share the love of your hometown when your hometown has as much amazing musical talent as richmond does. lucy dacus, dj williams projekt, no BS brass band and of course gwar… and the gem that is matthew e white. his mix of soulful gospel funk digs deep down into your soul and settles there, slightly familiar and engaged. see him play along with flo morrissey at baby’s all right thursday night. all info here, 146 broadway. at baby’s all right – make baby’s all right again™


Raise Up for Women at Industry City Distillery, Sunset Park. 
the only light in the midst of this deep, dark, shit-filled tunnel we are currently in is that there has been so much good to get involved in. to show your support, to have your voice heard. and especially for womens rights. thursday night at Industry City Distillery, BiT’s favorite (not so)little distillery in sunset park, is hosting a benefit supporting six amazing organizations for women. 100% of the monies goes to benefiting organizations doing amazing work for and by women: Make the Road, My Sister’s Place, Hattie Carthan Community Garden, Black Women Artists for Black Lives Matter, ViBe Theater Experience, Trans Women of Color Collective… plus art, music, performance, installation, dancing, and of course, house made vodka. don’t say no, just say yes. all info here, 7-11pm, 33 35th st, at industry city distillery, where science never looked so sexy or went down so smoothly.




Prom 2017 at The Gutter, in that gray area between Greenpoint and Williamsburg.
ah, prom! that night of really bad fashion choices, really bad vodka that was hidden indiscreetly in water bottles and chugged in the back of someone’s jeep and immediately followed by really bad dance moves and really bad sex. let’s redo it, eh? ok maybe not the outfits or the cheap vodka but definitely the mediocre love-making. we deserve more, and more, and then more. don’t you tell me to get my head out of the gutter, until you get your head into it. 8pm-midnight, $5. all proceeds go to benefit the ACLU, so we’re already doing much better 😃 4 bands play all night, the rizzos, dentist, the mad doctors, and sirs&madams. all info here, BYOcorsage, and then stick it in someone. baby. everything you need to know is here200 N 14th st.



It’s Friday, I’m (not) In Love Party at Littlefield, Gowanus.
you know the best way not to get a little love on valentine’s weekend? it’s to bitch about love. instead, open your hearts and your lips baby. and come to this, “it’s friday i’m not in love” anti-valentine’s day party and change that little opinion of yours. have some drinks, get loose. dance up on a stranger. make love in the bathroom. i don’t care how you do it, just quit your bitchin. also there’s a photo booth. wear all black, prizes for creativity. $6-10. all info here. 622 degraw st.


Planned Parenthood Danceathon at the Knockdown Center in Astoria.
WE MUST PROTECT THIS HOUSE! our bodies, that is. they are temples and there are so many rad ways to celebrate and demonstrate.  so this weekend. revel with a cause baby, knock ‘em down, dance it out. at the planned parenthood danceathon at the knockdown center. 9pm-2am, all info here. 52-19 flushing ave.


Interactive Love Games Art Exhibition and Benefit, at IMAGE Gallery, Bushwick. 
tell me you didn’t get turned on looking at that photo. you did. well then, it looks like someone should bring their loveworthy little body to interactive love games art exhibition. immerse yourself in edgy, racey, and quite lovely artwork performance, and movement. come solo or with someone or with a few someones. spread love, make love. your donation benefits planned parenthood, so love tha tbody and all the other bodies. tickets and other info here. 7-10pm, 1501 broadway. 



LGBTQ+ Makeout Session in front of Trump Tower. (no i am not kidding.)
oh HELLLLL yeah. listen, it doesn’t matter of course who you love and how you love them because love is love is love, but what does matter is that our shitwad of a president doesn’t feel that way. so if you lean in a more traditional sense of love, let’s bend the rules this saturday. why? because we’re having a big LGBTQ+ makeout sesh in front of trump tower. oh yeah. partners not required and allies welcome! meet at 12pm at the central park west hotel. we will all march together to trump tower and makeout. until 3pm. all info here.


Women Self-Care Faire at the New Women Space in Bushwick
we should keep fighting for our rights and our bodies but we also have to balance it out with plenty of loving. this full-day dedicated to women’s self care celebrates and demonstrates the love we should have for our bodies and ourselves and each other. in partnership with babeland and lunette, the full schedule includes workshops focused on self-love and meditation, organic skincare demonstration made in bushwick, sex toy workshop for enhancing your solo experience or your confidence in the bedroom, and a discussion on the unnecessarily taboo subject of reuseable menstrual products. 12-6pm, full schedule here. let’s do this. all events take place at the new women space, which you should check out all of the amazing things they’re doing there. 188 woodman rd.


El Imperio plays at Threes Brewing, Gowanus.
so it was just threes birthday and we all missed it. yeah. but that’s ok because we can go and celebrate and dance and groove saturday night to el imperio, who will be mixing a rather intoxicating blend of afrobeat, latin, soul and rock to layer over the already intoxicating brews overflowing with love from every oraphus at threes. and by oraphus i mean tap. and your pores as you sweat on the dance floor. drink up and absorb. the event is free, 8-11pm, all info here. 333 douglass st. at threes brewing- i’ll try anything thrice.™
 Anti-Valentine’s Day Party at the Mccarren Park Hotel, Williamsburg.
do i need to go into the futility of hating valentine’s day again? no? ok good. well, there’s this party happening on the rooftop of the mccarren park hotel which is kind of anti-valentine’s day, but sometimes the things we dislike ignite us and invigorate us and unite us even more. because we don’t have time to be a hater. hater? i hardly knew her! all info here. no cover, come dance all night. 10pm-2am. 160 N 12th st.



Greenpointers Valentine’s Day Market, in Greenpoint!
oh you know what this is. it’s the super rad valentine’s day market that greenpointers throws every year. amazing artisans, food, drinks, tunes, free poetry, massages, a hell of a great view and a big silly guy dressed in a cupid diaper doing some of the best freestyling i’ve ever heard. come with the intention to buy gifts, stay for everything i’ve just mentioned. this is the best way to spend your sunday (along with all the things mentioned below). all info here, get on it. 67 west st.


Mama’s Bazaar Valentine’s Market at House of Yes, Bushwick.
whoa whoa whoa, did you really think you were going to get through my entire love-centric weekend guide without a mention of house of yes? you crazy boo. everyone’s favorite little love shack warehouse in bushwick brings us a valentine’s day bazaar sunday as a dynamic preview to the beautiful celebration of love they will be having tuesday (stay tuned! but, would you want to spend valentine’s day not in a rooftop hot tub making bad decisions? hm didn’t think so.) sunday’s event will have the normal brooklyn-esque bazaar suspects, artisans, handmade jewelry, interesting soaps incasing magic treasures, as well as henna tattoos, sex toys, s&m gear, sensual massages, and so many more things to bewitch your imagination. happy hour is noon-2pm, dj dropkat spinning tunes until 6pm. all info here2 wyckoff ave, see you there.


Cheese Making Class and Romeo + Juliet Viewing at Humboldt and Jackson, Williamsburg.
cheese making, wines, a showing of romeo+juliet and your honey by your side for all of it. it doesn’t get much better than this folks. head to humboldt and jackson for a lesson in ricotta making followed by a cozy showing of romeo+juliet where you can snuggle up to your sweetie and give absolutely no clues that you’re pretending he’s leonardo dicaprio (again.) plus it’s free. you must rsvp, all info here. it’s at humboldt and jackson streets.


get out there and spread that love. don’t let me down.


the weekend guide | 17-20 november 2016

in CULTURE, weekend guide
Ring the bells that still can ring
Forget your perfect offering
There is a crack in everything
That’s how the light gets in.
– leonard cohen.


Imperfect and shining. Cracked and resilient. Iridescent and strong. Take this feeling and momentum with you into the weekend, Brooklyn. Be more than you think you are, and always better together.
I’ve made a plan that I promise is all it’s cracked up to be. Come with me, won’t you? Your weekend guide is shining through.



The Wild Honey Pie’s 7th Birthday Bash at Union Pool, Williamsburg.
so i have a confession to make- i want to be the wild honey pie. despite my generally sweet and definitively unbridled nature, and my tendency to respond quite well to a little heat, cornstarch, and when enveloped warmly in flaky pastry, i still can’t get in there. so, i’ll go to this. where there will be cake and games and performance and high brew coffee will have free coffee and coffee-infused cocktails to equally liven up and generally confuse your desired thursday night high. i’ll agree not to mind if you do. $15 all info here, 7pm-midnight, 484 union ave at union pool- pool me once, no shame in that.™
Sensory Speed Dating, House of Yes, Bushwick.
because it seems now that dating decisions are decided by impulsive reactions based on 5 photos followed by the very few nerve endings in our fingertip as it swipes right. house of yes, as always, offers us a refreshing and edgy alternative to anything in our normal lives. thursday’s events welcomes a more obtrusive yet let judgmental dating option. that you want to do, just close your eyes and stick out your tongue and trust me. it’s sensory dating. rely on none of your senses, just your perception. described in such better ways here. (hint: hold on to the blindfold) $25-30  2 wyckoff ave AT house of YES, there all senses say YES.™
  eastern district greenpoint
Spanish Oil + Vinegar Tasting at Eastern District, Williamsburg, Brooklyn. 
let’s be honest. there is always time for spanish wine because it’s always time for spanish wine. every waking hour. so when then do you make time for spanish olive oil and vinegar? eastern district in NoGreePo has our answer. thursday night, 5-7pm. free tasting of the aformentioned but oft-neglected delicacies. come interested, leave intrigued, then let’s all go get 2-for-1 or 4-for-2 G&T’s at el born to finally satiate or spark our spanish desires. 5-7pm at eastern district, 1053 manhattan ave. 5pm-toda la noche at el born, address. because you were el born this way.™



Glamdammit presents The Brats, at Gold Sounds in Bushwick.
to live in brooklyn is to live vicariously throughout so many decades of influential music and wish we could forget fashion statements. well let’s just embrace all of them, friday night. our funky fresh favorites at glamdammit! bring us the brats, contemporaries of blondie and the ramones and the new york dolls and kiss, to say the least. jam the fuck out and forget your age and the year and remember, only, the beat. and of course that time is fucking relative. free, all other info here. 11am-4pm, 44 wilson ave. at gold sounds, where silent isn’t golden.™


Salsa Fridays at Subrosa, Meatpacking, Manhattan.
subrosa, literally beneath the rose, which is so everything that this club is and will be as soon as you arrive. just beneath the simple sweetness it exudes. stunning rhythm and subversive beats, and then your intentions will become nothing but hips and sweat and button downs. just go with it. live music, no cover. i’ll cover for you the next day. just DM me and express your need for an alibi. all info here. free every friday in november. 63 gansevoort ave.


rooftop reds
the view from rooftop reds.
Closing Week at Rooftop Reds at the Navy Yard. 
this is the last week for open hours at rooftop reds. which, if you haven’t been reading or paying attention or altogether drinking wine at subpar altitudes, you need to be there. the only urban winery in the greatest urban area, and the wines, even without all of this, would speak for themselves. add hammocks and sunsets and ladder golf and corn hole and it all adds up to no excuses. they’ll be open friday 4-9pm, sat 2-10pm. plus there’s a damn goo dsale on wine. all info here, find them at 4th st at the navy yard.




this exists in queens.
NY Adventure Club ventures into Jamaica, Queens.
all of new york is always just at our fingertips. even the hidden parts, the ones that seem completely unattainable… you just have to seek them with an open heart and mind. and as chance favors those who are prepared, prepare yourself for this event with (none other) than the ny adventure club. venture to the absolutely breathtaking and aptly spanish-inspired loews valencia wonder theater, in jamaice queens. all info here, 11am-1pm. 16511 jamaica ave.


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the (birthday!) weekend guide | 10-13 november 2016.

in CULTURE, weekend guide
when love is a whisper and hate is a roar it feels hard to know how to speak again, how to move again, how to be again.

no matter what side of the coin you fall on, we’re divided and it hurts and it’s hard to know what to do now. but the important thing is to hold on to this energy. to embrace our anger and concern. to move, to breathe, to demonstrate, together. and we can start in so many ways but the first is within our communities and our cities. get out, get going. don’t hide in your homes within the safety of your opinions. have every one of those conversations and maybe a laugh or two. see the other side or have a healthy debate. understand that there’s more that unites us often than divides us so let’s figure out how to do this together.

as with every week, i’ve found the best options in the city for doing just that. so hold on to me and hold on to each other and let’s feel better and make better and do better, together.



Live Reading from The King of Greenpoint, TBD Bar, Greenpoint. 
to know where you came from and where you’re going… new york is by definition a melting pot. and we are stronger and so much more intelligent because of our smattering of cultures and heritages and beliefs. but this place we have descended upon has a story and a heartbeat too, other than ours. so let’s hear about it and listen to it thursday night, at TBD bar. author geoffrey cobb reads from his book the king of greenpoint (of course not to be confused with the king of the bears of greenpoint). come learn about the life and reign of peter j mcguinness. a night of stories and beer and wine. free. 7-8pm, 224 franklin st. at TBD, where everything has already been decided for you we just know how much you like suspense™


Southern Tier benefit for Homeless Pets, at Rosamunde Sausage, Williamsburg.
i have shed quite a few southern tears for homeless pets, even to go as far as to adopt one. which i wish he would remember… but alas. let’s instead concentrate on ingesting some southern tiers thursday night, and maybe a sausage or two at rosamunde in williamsburg. yep it’s a sausage and beer benefit, proceeds going towards in our hands animal rescue. come through and eat well and be merry. and save our furry little friends. more info here, 6-10pm, 285 bedford ave at rosamunde sausages (or did you say hostages?)


Ghostwriter Viewing Party, Videology, Williamsburg.
i want to shake the hand of whomever is in charge of making thinking up the events at videology. no fo real, who’s doing this? because i want to shake your hand. because i’m positive, ghostwriter, that it’s everyone’s favorite 90s series, errr, 2nd favorite 3rd favorite 4th favorite ok one that you remember! ish! and HEY it was actually filmed in fort greene, so come get really really close to where it all started and celebrate this epic cinematographic movement at videology thursday night.308 bedford ave, 7-9pm, $5 at videology
Mortified at Littlefield, Gowanus
mmm. the only thing more therapeautic than talking about your most embarrassing moments is living vicariously through someone elses (you know waht i mean… we were all obsessed with that section of YM magazine…) hear it in real life, the-moth style, thursday night at littlefield. all info and tickets here. doors at 7, shows at 8. tickets, $10. 622 degraw st.




Rubblebucket at Manhattan Inn, Greenpoint.
spike hill. glass lands. cameo gallery. aviv. manhattan inn. something in that list doesn’t belong, yet. which totally, totally, totally fucking blows. manhattan inn is closing and that means what we are losing one more of the complex and beautiful threads that weave this beautiful tapestry that is the reason and the lifeline of this people we call brooklyn. rubblebucket promises to send them out in style friday night. tickets you should get immediately RIGHT NOW HERE. ill be there. show starts at 630 and your RSVP DOES NOT EQUAL ENTRY. arrive early.


ROOTS Cafe Poetry Series, Park Slope
there is nothing better than the warmth of shared verse among virtual strangers. come to roots cafe’s monthly poetry series and feel enlightened, rejuvenated, inspired… and perhaps a bit more grounded (that was a root pun!) contributors and observers welcome. 8-10pm, 639 fifth ave. seek, here.


Adult Friction, Indie-Alt Dance Party at Over the 8, Williamsburg.
we young people are energized by a few things, but mostly friction on any level. the one that leaves us feeling empowerd and impassioned by a charged political atmosphere, and the one that consists of button downs and heat on a friday night. make friday night be a perfect storm of both, plus [tunes spinning from] LCD soundsystem and basically all the dope artists they’ve inspired. it’s an indie-alt dance party. get in there and let it rub off on you. at over the 8, 594 union ave,



Free Fridays at Subrosa, Meatpacking District in Manhattan. 
we live in this city to embrace culture and be embraced by said cultures. notably, on friday nights in basement clubs with sweat and hip movements and live bands and alive hands. and things like that. yep. it’s subrosa friday nights, and they’re free all month and yours for the taking. plus it’s your only reason to cross the river this weekend so cruciamos. party starts when you get there… but basically at 10pm. all info here63 gansevoort st. 



so a little thing is happening this weekend that i like to call MY BIRTHDAY.
i wanted to take this perfectly lovely fall weekend to show you how to spend an ideal birthday weekend in new york. with all of your best friends and like maybe your dad or something doing all of my favorite things but not aging a bit, of course. so come along and i dont know, maybe bring a gift that i’d like or something. (seriously, you’re invited.)
Fall Colors Picnic in Central Park
the leaves they are-a-changin and they’ll all be bare and gone before we know it. so let’s embrace that giant piece of nature and magic that the ancient gods of the city placed before us and have a real autumnal picnic in central park. and do those little boats that i love. bring wine and cheese and everything else you want to be there. starts at noon.


Virginia Tech plays Georgia Tech
my team is 7 and 2 folks. it feels like the good old days again and we are all hopeful and passionate. and ready to ramble some wrecks from georgia tech. come join in the spirit of american college football and beer drinking at keg and lantern. kickoff is a 330.


el born greenpoint
Tapas and Paella at El Born, Greenpoint.
yep. when people have birthdays, especially of the decadian significance, they want to share good foods and great wines with the best people. and maybe pretend a little bit that they are in spain. have all of this and so so much more saturday night at el born. hear me gush about it here more than a piping hot croqueta then come. 8pm. 651 manhattan ave.

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the weekend guide | 29-2 october 2016.

in CULTURE, weekend guide
Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore.

…and then let me see if I can’t turn things around for them?

this quote of course is inscribed on that proud little lady in the right side of this photo I captured, but all the rest of the content is taken straight from the lady sitting behind her little laptop. or perched upon her bicycle, exploring the city in search of a better weekend for us all. I too have been called somewhat of a beacon of hope, a statuesque stronghold, the greatest gift france ever gave to america.

i will let you decide what, if any, of those things are true.

in the mean time, embark on a good honest weekend. i’ll be here, constantly vigilant.
AHOY, brooklyn. (ahoy.)



so if you haven’t been to the new bazaar then this image makes no sense to you but if you have well then… i’m sure we are well acquainted by now.
Lagunitas Brewing presents a dope free show at the Brooklyn Night Bazaar, Greenpoint. 
from the people who put the “pub” in public radio, who make the best IPA in this nation budding with hoppy competition, and the “lagunita” in the little lake of peepee you tend to make after having too much beer, lagunitas brewery comes to the brooklyn night bazaar thursday with a free event. why? because since the bazaar was moved out of its space, shows can only be free when (kind-hearted) sponsors who also sell dope shit come along to help out. unlike that other “sponsor” who did the opposite of helping out. so let’s all go and have beers and see self defense family, jesus piece, pawns, and glory. 7pm, all info here. 150 greenpoint ave at the night bazaar.



Swatch Party at Good Room, Greenpoint.
but i mean if it’s a party at good room, i’ll do what i have to do. come to this. i know nothing more about it, but it’s thursday and friday and well… i’ll be swatching our for you. 98 meserole ave. at good room – where you don’t have to be bad to get in but… nothing feels better.™




Tainted Love, 80s Dance Party at the Bell House, Gowanus.
this tainted love you give… it’s so, so much better than no love at all. let’s go move it and shake it at the bell house for 980s dance night, the cure for well… thursday nights with no love at all. event is free, 10pm until the love runs out. or the taints come out. either way, i ain’t gonna be caught with my pants down. info here149 7th st at the bell house – you rang?™




Bob Moses at Terminal 5, in that rather shitty area of manhattan. 
two reasons to go to this show – 1. bob moses is dope as shit and his music toes that stunningly listenable line between r&b and electronic, soulful beats and laid with languid harmonies. 2. imma be there homey. and this chick too. tickets. here. show starts at … if for some reason you still ahve doubt, well nevermind then don’t go. but if you want to listen and get pumped up before the show here. at terminal 5- where every beginning feels like the end.



60 Shots for 60 Shorts Power Hour at Creek and Cave, Long Island City.
i don’t know about you, but i never want to do a power hour again. i mean really – there are so many more inventive ways to get fucked up than chugging shots of beers and ending up bloated and burpy and completely sauced at some frat party. we’ve all grown up and maybe, the concept of the power hour also has. (also, this isn’t to be confused with the hour of power… of course). party boys chris donahue and … compiled 1-minute shorts by 60 comedians for your viewing and drinking pleasure… and between each act you have to take a shot of beer. or you know, just laugh and sip. and be called a fucking weenie. tickets and info here, $5. show and beer drinking begin at 10pm. 10-93 jackson ave, at creek + cave.



Dave Chapelle’s Block Party “Screening” (but actually it’s another party) in Fort Greene Park.
OUTDOOR MOVIES AREN’T DEAD. they’re just chilled out a bit.
let this be a lesson, to all of us. just like spike lee and dave chappelle, and bill murray’s appearances, when you make something big of your life, come back and have unannounced amazing parties in brooklyn. dave chapelle did this in clinton hill, the area where he grew up, back in 2004 and invited tons of awesome pals. see the documentary film about the night and the man himself right in the ‘hood where it all went down (and sorry, but doesn’t it seem like this is just going to become another “random” block party?? YEP. i’m not missing it this time and neither should you.) here’s how not to miss it. 645-845pm, fort greene park, myrtle ave and st. edwards st.



Glass Animals at Music Hall of Williamsburg.
is sold out both nights.
just wanted to dig that knife a little bit more, that’s all.
let’s commiserate right next door at one of my favorite spots in williamsburg, cubana social70 N 6th st. live music, killer mojitos, and some of the best empanadas in town. #glassanimalswho #jkstillfuckinghurts #bad



Richard Avedon, Moving Image, Exhibit at the Cadillac House, SoHo.
if you aren’t familiar with richard avedon’s unbelievable life’s work of stunning photography, then just trust me- you want to go to this exhibit. besides it’s your only reason to cross the river this weekend. avedon’s portraiture is unnerving and monumental. he would photograph celebrities for hours on end, having them sit or stand and vaguely pose until their exhaustion and annoyance took over and finally that moment where the humanity leaked through the facade and SNAP. there it would be. oh and also- he was easily the authority of fashion photography for his 60-year career. see some of his stuff here and then head QUICK to the final night of his exhibit at the cadillac house, 330 hudson st. 10am-7pm. info and such here.



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the weekend guide | 1-5 sept 2016

in CULTURE, weekend guide

we work hard in this city, and that’s the beauty and downfall of new york- no one is here because they just ‘ended up here’. we’re here because we have something to believe in, to fight for, to work towards. and well, we’ve come a long way, baby. and it’s about time that someone recognized it. this labor day weekend, let’s reap the fruit of our labors. let’s weep for the labors that we’ve had to put in just for our fruits to blossom. and then die. before we could even retrieve them. let’s experience everything that this city has to offer beyond the confines of our cubicles! let’s close our laptops and leave our to-do lists undone and not even put up an out of office and let’s never look back brooklyn.

(are you picturing me on a soapbox in front of the statue of liberty holding a bottle of champagne with a slight tear in my eye?)

(oh… well, are you doing that now?)

ok you unimaginitive little beasts- lighten up and read on.

and let’s fucking get to work.


Thursday Supper at the Farm on Kent, Williamsburg. 
sure, maybe it feels to early to celebrate the apple harvest, but it seems that our dear corporate companions did not hesitatated to stuff mini crunch bars and plastic jackolanterns and pumpkin spice everything down our throats just after easter. SO, let’s gently start our fall harvest celebrations with something beautiful and wholesome and pure. thursday night brings us a cider dinner at the beautiful north brooklyn farms. dine outside with pre-fall bounty from the garden and cider pairings from aaron burr cidery. **ATTN** these dinners are sold out for the next few months, so go to this one tonight, 7-1030pm. tickets, here – $100 gets you an unbelievable meal, cider pairings, and one of the few unobstructed views we still have of the east river. 320 kent ave. QUICK GO GO GO. cider?!?! i ‘ardly knew ‘er!

New York Salsa Congress, all over the city, all weekend.
with all of the club-bumping we lose ourselves into each weekend, celebrate instead this stunning form of artistic expression. this weekend is the annual new york salsa congress, featuring free lessons, showcasing some of the greatest salsa dancers from all over the world, hours of open dancing with live bands and each night offering an after party that starts at 3am. nothing is more captivating or seductive than salsa dancing, and i guarantee it will heat up in a much better way than the panther room at output. events schedule, tickets, and a bunch of other stuff to get you pumped found here.
Archestratus Blue Plate Special, Greenpoint.
this week’s sicilian family dinner at archestratus was, at press time (and maybe until you arrive!) TBD- which means that you are going to have to go on the faith that everything is magic inside of archestratus and family-style dinners in nogreepo are always a good idea and paige knows what she’s doing. (that’s a pretty good bet) 7-10pm – full plates and homemade bread, alcoholic bevvies for sale. 160 huron st.


Black Rock Brooklyn at House of Yes, Bushwick.
are you sick of all of the mystical and dustily epic burning man images from all of your friends this past week? i’ll be honest, i’m not. but, i can’t keep from imagining myself in some rainbow-bright-meets-the-rocketeer-meets-the-rockettes-esque costume zooming around on my bicycle-turned-batmobile-turned-aladins-magic-carpet. lets turn all of those pure imagination-fueled images into reality and burn it down together at the house of yes friday night. it’s a burn event for all of us who could’t make it. there will be costumes and playa bikes and more black lights and wild decor than ever and also all of those things you think you could expect at burning man itself. but then we all go home at the end of the night, or to an after hours party… up to you. free before 11pm, or tickets $15, here. 2 wykoff ave. at the house of yes- where they don’t take no for an answer.


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Grand Opening, Greenpoint Fish + Lobster, Long Island City.
for all of the wonder and fishy enjoyment and oyster tacos and raw bar delights that greenpoint fish co has been bringing to us for the past 3 years, it’s time we shared a bit of love with our neighbors to the north. greenpoint fish + lobster opens a long island city outpost that promises to offer more seating, some grab and go options for you laborers, plus all the best specials and taco tuesday with a gansett deals you know and love. grand opening is friday. go celebrate, then go back. so i can have my motherfucking spot back at the greenpoint location. (hey! just kidding! come sit with me!) 5-43 48th Ave at Vernon Blvd.


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The Last Fireworks of the Season at Coney Island.
the worst things about summer ending? the sidewalk simply doesn’t replace the boardwalk. getting a hot dog from a hot dog stand feels desperate, not noble, and not as easy to blame sudden loud noises on fireworks with a hopeful smile. (man that got depressing fast) well let’s get our last fill this friday at coney island. sun, sand, fireworks, hot dogs, bearded ladies and bearded men! roller coasters! baseball! skeeball! skeezy balls! come onnnn! last fireworks show of the season starts at 930pm, at W 10th st at coney island. all other events and cool things, here.



Mets vs Nationals at Citifield, Flushing, Queens.
come meet the mets, and me! at the mets game. i’ll be signing autographs and giving you exclusive weekend events access, plus plenty of BiT schwag up in row 528! come on down! and then up! game starts at 705pm. helmet nachos start at 706pm. at citifiled, tickets, here. take me out to the ballll game! or wherever… just as long as you take me out.


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Rule of III Pop-Up at Duke’s Annex, Greenpoint.
that little room of requirement attached to duke’s liquour box (which is  room of requirement in and of itself) opens its magical doors again friday night and keeps them open, all september long, for “rule of III” a pop-up assemply of handmade fasions, beauty, and wellness experiences by local brooklyn creative collective. come by and be inspired, be transformed… then get a little bit of whiskey and get friskey. opening is friday, 12-9pm. 170 franklin st.


el jefe
First Friday’s with El Jefe’s Nachoria at The Diamond, Brooklyn.
nachos cheese torched before your eyes, just after they ask for it. because they are naughty nachos that give themselves away for free. go, partake. i won’t tell anyone. nachoing begins at 730pm. beers run all day, all night. 43 franklin st. get tipsy and chipsy. then maybe a little lipsy. (just not in poughkeepsie.)

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the weekend guide | 18-21 august 2016

in CULTURE, weekend guide

ok folks let’s check in here. it’s august 18th- how many hot dogs have you had this summer? at what shade is your summer skin? do you know where your unborn children are? well not to panic here or anything but TIME IS RUNNING OUT. get out there and make some bad decisions and get a sunburn and smother yourself in mustard. and then rinse off in a chilled rosé shower. and then jump in the ocean, or hug a stranger or I DON’T KNOW ok? but i’m panicking. let’s all take a deep breath of this hot luscious august air and attack these last few weeks, together. with our sweaty palms squished tightly against each other.

come with me. and don’t you dare look back.



the break vintage will break you (without leaving you broke)
Happy Hour at The Break Vintage, Bushwick.
maybe your ass has been all over bushwick, but here’s a chance to leave your mark. and to drink free rosé. and to get mad discounts on amazing vintage. how is all of this possible? because when the break vintage has an end of summer sale and they add free wine, washable body paint, and thongs to create beautiful butt art. on the walls. this is how we do things here in brooklyn, and trust me- this event will be all its cracked up to be. 574 bogart st, #312. 5-8pm, info here. the break vintage is trying to break your heart. just like wilco.


REVEAL at the Warsaw, Greenpoint.

the warsaw is an old polish national house in greenpoint where you can see everything from monsters wrestling, community bingo night, and progressive musicians doing progressive things. thursday night will transform the cafeteria-event hall into an exhibit showcasing the best current and local artists in film, fashion, music, art, performance and everything else it says in that handy graphic above. there will be a runway show, a medley of live music, interactive visual art galleries and living hair and makeup statuettes on pedestals that will make you question hair, makeup, and humanity. go to this event and be amazed at the limitless nature of art and performance. tickets, $20 can be purchased here. hang up the hooligan garb you normally wear to the warsaw, it’s cocktail attire. so get fancy. 7-11pm, 261 driggs. info and tickets here. because nothing says raw like cocktail dresses and human statuettes.



Pizza Night at Archestratus Books, Greenpoint.
it’s nothing new to have odd conglomeration/fusion of things in this city- we’re pressed for space but not for creativity. so north greenpoint’s bookstore-bar-restaurant-eventspace is bringing you everything you’ve ever wanted in one charming little space. thursday night is monthly build-your-own-pizza night with 20 locally procured toppings to choose from and chef allie laporte of wilson daniels to give you a wine pairing for your unique creation. $16/pie, beer, wine, and vermouth for purchase. 7-9pm. all info here160 huron st. at archestratus,


LONDON, ENGLAND - AUGUST 1: Ricardo Santos of Brazil jumps to serve the ball as teammate Pedro Cunha watches against Martin Reader and Joshua Binstock of Canada during the Men's Beach Volleyball preliminary match between the Brazil and Canada on Day 5 of the London 2012 Olympic Games at Horse Guards Parade on August 1, 2012 in London, England.
men’s beach volleyball at the london olympics.
Olympics Viewing Party and Photography Exhibit, Brooklyn Museum, Prospect Heights. 

if you haven’t taken the opportunity to tune out all of this political bullshit and celebrate america and watch the olympics, there is hope for you not. and you are a curmudgeon. for everyone else, come watch the olympics in a rad sculpture garden and then be moved by the photography exhibit Who Shot Sports, a collection of prolific photos from the olympics, 1843-present. 8-10pm, free200 eastern parkway. info here.



Out for Drinks with Orr Shtuhl at Archestratus, Greenpoint. 
i remember my first beer. and have a feeling that i will remember the one i have friday night, at archestratus, but i gotta be honest- i’ve forgotten a hell of a lot of the ones in between. make and share some memories at everyone’s favorite bookstore in NoGreePo. Orr Stuhl shares his love of beers, brewing, and the persistance of memory- and how alcohol inevitably affects it. $14 includes a beer, all info here, 7pm at archestratus books, 160 huron st. 


End of Summer Party, Bushwick Public House, Bushwick. 
it’s mid-august in brooklyn, not september in ibiza. there is absolutely no need to promote everything as if it’s the last weekend and we’re never going to see sunlight or bare knees again. however, that does not mean we should hesitate to celebrate sunlight and bare knees. and do so with all of our closest friends and a slew of impressive fucking djs (DJs Simon Sez, Ella Hu$$le, Reez, and Beazy Hype) at the bushwick public house, for free, on friday night. 1288 myrtle ave, the bushwick public house- they put the lick in public(k).™
Love Muscle at the House of Yes, Bushwick.

nothing should surprise you anymore about the epic and out-there events at the house of yes. friday’s musings bring us love muscle, which of course is a dance party with massive interactive sculptures. that you can climb on. in costume or in the nude, if you so choose. it also promises psychedelia, amazing conversation, sacred geometrical lamps (you can’t tell me those aren’t rad as fuck). go to this. and be the naked one climbing the sacred geometrical lamp, ok? just promise me that. free before 11pm with rsvp or $15, tickets and info here. 11pm-4am 2 wyckoff ave. love muscle at the house of yes- where you don’t have to strong arm me! it’s always yes.

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the weekend guide: 28-31 july 2016.

things we know: it’s hot. and it’s the weekend. and we pay way way too much rent to let anything get in the way of enjoying the last days of july.  every time you complain about the heat, remember those things we so amicably refer to as “sleeping bag coats“. and then have a sip of rosé and get movin’.
ah, not sure how? i have an idea or two…


Brooklyn Screams for Ice Cream! Brookyn Historical Society, Brooklyn Heights.
the future and history of icecream. well, it’s either in my belly or about to be in my belly… let’s see if the brooklyn historical society can expand upon that (and knowing them, they damn well can.) come hear about icecream, see about icecream, learn about icecream, and have some too. rumor has it they will be offering hypotheses on the future of the cone, one of the only edible food containers born out of pure necessity. tickets, here128 pierrepoint st. i’ll stop the world and melt with you. thursday night.


Dreamcatcher Workshop at Line and Label, Greenpoint.
oh-oh dreamweaver, i believe you can get me through the niiiight by winding and twisting around me just so tightly and leaving woven into me pieces of your heart and your hopes and your dreams.
that’s my ballad about thursday night’s craft event, from the perspective of a feisty little wooden hoop. for more in this series, words as a wooden hoop. kindly find something else to read.
thursday night. brooklyn i’m trying darling Line + Label is having their FIRST and certainly not their last (i suppose pending the improvement of relative press coverage) craft event. make your own rad dream catcher and prevent those lucid aspirations from escaping ever again. plus look mega hip around new lovers and native americans. 568 manhattan ave, 5-8pm, $50 includes all materials. rsvp-, all other info here. love me, leave me… just don’t weave me.


look at these brilliant scientists, contemplating… their next tecate.
Drunk Science Presents: Outerspace at Littlefield, Boerum Hill. 
My Very Excellent Mom Just Served Us Three Drunk Comedians Talking About Space, at this charming little event space in south brooklyn. thursday night welcomes the debauchery of drunk science as three hipsters, rather predictably, pose as experts on just about anything and try to drunkenly convince a group of people why. in this case, they try to present their best dissertation about outerspace to a panel of real scientists and astronauts and one secret alien among them. tickets, $5, available at the door. all info here. 8-930pm, 622 degraw st. just tryin’ to cop a little field. baby.


David Byrne and other heads, talking… at Good Room, Greenpoint.
and you may ask yourself- this is not my beautiful good room. this has transformed into a panel discussion by some of the most progressive movers and shakers in the music industry. and then you may go to good room to see them. and you may be equally starstruck and inspired. and you may (you may!) bring that big oversized shoulder-heavy suit out of the closet and everyone will be totally cool with it. or like, mostly cool with it. the good room hosts david byrne, ryan schreiber, matthew ogle, and emilie friedlander friday night. 730-10pm, free; all info here. let’s all go, because it’s about time we all do something good for once at good room.


Cruel Summer- 80s Dance Party at the Bell House, Gowanus.
the only thing cruel about summer is when it leaves us. so don’t let it leave us. go and revel in everything its about, 80s style- so make sure you donnasummer outfit. at the bell house149 7th st. and as they say- if your ears are ringing, you can find them at the bell house.™  (and you should keep better track of your ears.)



Salchipapas VI at Archetratus, Greenpoint.
archestratus is such a fantastic enigma to me, and just exactly what this neighborhood needed- without knowing it yet. at the intersection of food and stories, words and bites, poetry and digestion. that’s where you’ll find archestratus. friday’s event brings a latin american street-food tradition of meats and greets and… streets. and also storytelling and poetry and music, all curated by roy hunter. more info here, 7-10pm, 160 huron st. street meat and greet, a great state to mate!

Campfire Fridays, Riis Park.
the beach bus is nice. coney island is… well, iconic. but how do you embody the feeling of being in a beach town when you reside in the sprawling metropolis that is our city? you go to campfire fridays at riis park, you bring your own instrument or vocal chords or clapping hands and you sit and you drink and you sway and you pretend not to notice the silhouette of the skyline fading into the distance, instead only seeing the fractured moonlight skipping along the waves. every friday, hosted by texas transplant lorena leigh everything you need to know is here, 7-9pm, 16702 rockaway beach blvd. kumbayanhavabeer.

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the weekend guide: 2-5 june 2016.

things i’m doing this weekend… that don’t include gov ball, but do include going to all the way more rad gov ball after dark parties (lots of which you will find listed below) and also hijacking kayaks (“hiyaking” as they refer to it in the biz*) (the biz of watercraft heist) and weazling my way into the actual fest. governors island may have been a former military base but let’s just say they have left a lot of permeable boundaries and i will see lcd soundsystem. me and all of you. on our kayaks. if you’re tough enough and interested, please let me know in the comments section below. and let me know what your tribe name will be for the mission. mine is kitchen mama, so if you wanted that to be yours, you best find yourself another mission.
only one kitchen mama here.
anyway VAMOS with the weekend plans! here they come!

Artgasm Collaborative Painting at House of Yes, Bushwick.
it’s thursday. and no better way to shed your “i’m a semi-serious professional adult who deliberates over big decisions and manages my finances” faux exterior than to, well, mask it. with paint. and then to use your honest body to contort and collab, to dance, to twist, to sit and meditate. and you know, maybe have a drink or two whilst aerialists dance overhead. confused? me too, but not enough to keep me away from artgasm at the house of yes- where they don’t take no for an answer™. tickets, $15. party is 6-9pm at 2 wyckoff ave. don’t paint me ’cause you aint me.
Lucy Dacus and Sam Cohen at Rough Trade, Williamsburg.
SO much good music this weekend!! and this will kick us off. richmond native lucy dacus is like a hybrid courtney barnet meets stevie nicks meets all the slightly dark and witty ironic lyrics you’ve ever heard but make you feel good instead of bad. and she’s from my motherfucking hometown. playing a rad show with houston-born sam cohen who is everybit as deep and synthy as jack white, with an extra dose of raw dynamism that is borderline addictive. GO see them. doors at 7pm, show’s at 8, $12 or the cost of sam cohen’s album gets you in (with the album too!) 64 N 9th st, i’ll trade you rough for so much smooth.
tiki party
Tiki Party, Brouwerij Lane
i neither know what this is about any more than i have any clue how to pronounce the name of this place. what i do know is this- they have a damn good selection of beers, a hip backyard, and if you’re lucky you’ll get a sighting of the old neighbor climbing up the back ladder with a bag of produce in his mouth, breaking into his own apartment. and you’ll think it’s pretty dope. come tonight to a tiki party with rockaway brew co, wear a hawaiian shirt and get a free pint! 7-10pm, 78 greenpoint ave, there is no point in clicking on this link because it hasn’t been updated since the 90s. just trust me, there’s an event there tonight. k? free plus the cost of beers. and tears.


live at the archway dumbo
Cabaret Under the Archway, Dumbo.
this weekly series hits every thursday night, june-sept, under the iconic brooklyn bridge archway and brings you a variety of shows ranging from all types of world music and dancing, dj dance parties, puppetry, improv theater, and plenty of beer and wine to help you blend it all together without missing a beat. this thursday presents a sultry cabaret and is totally free, 6-9pm, 20 jay st. it’s more than water under the bridge at this point.

Gov Ball After Dark: Bob Moses at Output, Williamsburg.
GAH if you see one gov ball after dark show, let this be… the one that kicks off all the others. bob moses happens to be the title track to my latest playlist and on top of that the guy is creating some of the best soulful dancey beats i’ve heard in a damn long time. he plays output thursday night, and we can all cheers govnah to that ish. together. just so you know, these tickets sold way way out and then they released more right here. so get yours right now. 74 wythe ave, 10pm-4am (sweet jesus).


listen i don’t know what’ up with friday nights lately, but it seems that brooklyn is all but trying to convince us to stay in. however, we will not. here’s are your best options tonight:
Rooftop Reds Urban Vineyard, Vinegar Hill.
yep, that would be a rooftop winery right in the brooklyn navy yard, started by 4 dope friends and offering free tours, rooftop yoga, pop-up dining experiences, and a ton of events you should start sipping on now. or, friday rather. tastings and tours noon-9pm (come right after your summer friyay release), at the navy yard, 4th st, fill ‘er up.



Gov Ball After Dark: POLIÇA and Solid Gold, Brooklyn Bowl, Williamsburg.
being one of my favorite bands to listen to real loud in a car, i can only imagine how amazing poliça will sound in the space at brooklyn bowl- oh wait, or i’ll just hear them actually do it on friday. because they are playing tonight’s gov ball after dark show and their techno-infused cacophony is just enough to make me want to close my eyes and throw my arms around and lose it completely. 61 wythe ave, doors at 11, show starts at 1130. it seems that all of the links to the tickets are broken so… i don’t know. just show up. fuck the polic(a).
go to your favorite dive bar if you don’t want to do either of those things. my picks? lake st, ontario bar, the diamond.

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31 march – 3 april 2016.


things i’m doing this weekend… that don’t include fooling my readers for any events happening friday.


Indigo Shibori Workshop, Dusty Rose Vintage, Greenpoint.

don’t dingy whites make you want to dye. ME. TOO. come learn the ancient practice of shibori dyeing with apprvl nyc this thursday at dusty rose vintage and leave with new and revamped textiles and the ability to turn any fabric into a deep indigo dream. oh also- they will have wine. bring your own clothing to breathe fresh life into and use fabrics, tools, and dyes provided. tickets HERE. 7-9pm at dusty rose, 251 greenpoint ave. wine and dye me, baby.

Ryan Hemsworth, Output, Williamsburg. 

AH, i love ryan hemsworth. if you’re not familiar with his stuff listen to this tune on repeat a few times and you’ll get what i’m saying. he’s right in the midst of this amazing electroRyan-Hemsworth-R&B-soul scene and he’s playing at output, tomorrow. somehow i got on a secret list (might have something to do with my impending celebrity… might also have something to do with every other brooklyn listerv i’m subscribed to. you choose) (don’t.) and i have 4 +1’s. come be one of them. 74 wythe ave, i’ll be at the back of the club tryin’ to call your phone. if you aren’t there. (that’s a line from the song.) (but i’ll actually do it if you leave me your number. and some love. in my comments area.)

In Memory of Michael, a live show by Atomic Funk Project, Brooklyn Bowl, Williamsburg.

atomic funk project brings you all of their big-band funk, soul, and bluesy groovin’ energy to play michael jackson’s off-the-wall album in its entirety, plus other funky classics! doors at 6pm, show at 8pm. tickets, $10, 61 wythe ave. I’ll bring the funk.




New Orleans Crawfish Boil, The Hall at MP Taverna, Williamsburg. 

all night. spicy creole cuisine and funky fresh lowlands bands can’t be bad. I’ll buy your ticket if you can tell me the difference between a crayfish, a crawfish, and a crawdad (leave it in the comments!) tickets here, bands start at 6 but music and crustaceans will be crackin’ all night long baby. at MP Tavern, 470 driggs ave. shell i save you a dance?


First Friday’s Nachos with El Jefe Nachoria, The Diamond, Greenpoint.

nachos cheese torched before your eyes, just after they ask for it. because they are naughty nachos that give themselves away for free. go, partake. i won’t tell anyone. nachoing begins at 730pm. beers run all day, all night. 43 franklin st. get tipsy and chipsy.


light painting is this.

Light Painting at Little Water Radio, South Street Seaport, Lower Manhattan. 

be part of the installation, just by gettin’ in the groove… and finding your reason to cross the river this weekend.  part of the Out to See festival, this performance art exhibit meets dance party meets flashlight tag all-night event will have you performance-dancing, questioning who your friends are, and dodging seizures until the wee hours. 7-midnight, 192 front st. lighten up.


24-hour Creation Loop, The Wise Guys House, Bushwick.

it’s like double-dutch but with artistic endeavors. jump in and help keep this 24-hour loop of creation alive by contributing anything from sculpting, filming, rapping, drawing, web development, car painting, live theater, zombie dancing and so, so much more. at The Wise Guys House (this is an apartment, by the way), 154 Ellery St. i will be contributing my talent for shadow puppets of past presidents’ countenances, so don’t take that one. don’t be out of the loop.

**disclaimer- the information about this event disappeared almost as quickly as i reported on it, shrowding it an added layer of april-fools-day-mystery-or-foolery. so super rad if you decide to go. report back, ok?


Live Music at Milk and Roses, Greenpoint.

this enchanting little gem in NoGreePo beckons you in with its rustic charm- antique books line the walls, a baby grand piano with a live pianist nightly, a hidden garden in the back with gnomes peeking out of the bushes, giggling and chirping just ever so perceptively. oh yeah, and their cocktails are dope. live music every friday so pop in and get lost in there, for a while.

music 8-midnight, 1110 manhattan ave.


mccarren pool party
yep, i know this image is old. but they haven’t made a new one. deal with it, it’s for aesthetic purposes. and prosthetic porpoises… which will be in the pool, of course. as will you if you keep being such a stickler about dates. must a remind you about the relativity of time?
One Night Only, McCarren Hotel, Williamsburg.

ah, brooklyn! relentlessly redeeming yourself from inflating rents with dope parties like this.

one night only, until next month! 10pm-2am, this season’s first of a summer-long partnership of rooftop pool parties at the mccarren park hotel. so what if it’s still cold. so what if it’s supposed to rain. so what if you can come up with any other excuse that you find valid- so what if you find me there? i’ll let you buy me a drink, of course. 160 N 12th st. dive in.



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